When Tears Run Red
by Bert the Nomad
Summary: What would you do if you were supposed to be dead? A blackbird whose lost and beat? This is a tale of when tears run red and when two such blackbirds meet. A story of love, obsession, and the violent roads we take. Revised and Reposted.
1. Chapter 1 Good Business

New Author's Note: This is a repost of my old story 'When Tears Run Red', prequel to my other story 'The Scarlet Sonata'. There are quite a few differences from the original, enough so I thought a re-post would be better than a simple revision. In any case, please enjoy the new and improved WTRR, with half the calories but all the taste!

-Bert the Nomad

…_Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies…_

**_-_**_Aristotle_

**_Jump_****_City_****_11:02 p.m.: _**Professor Chang had his hands folded, his shoulders hunched, his eyes level. A small light glowed from overhead, illuminating his mahogany desk like finely polished stone. The room was dark. His gaze drifted temporarily down to his watch, then forwards again.

_Two days, four hours, thirteen minutes_, he thought quietly. _At least he's specific about arrival time._ With a sigh, he blinked and then leaned back casually in his chair. "I usually don't make last minute appointments." He said, scratching his chin nonchalantly with his index finger. "And I usually don't make appointments…with people I don't know."

Across from his desk, two little red lights shone back. One coming from the security console next to the door…the other coming from the hazy end of a small, glowing cigarette placed comfortably between a figure's lips. This was all there was to see.

The red dot swiveled to the floor as the figure lowered the cigarette and tapped a bit of ash from the tip with his pinky as he spoke. "This business means the world to me professor. I'll do anything in my power to gain your cooperation."

Chang eyed him. The man moved like a natural smoker, but his voice sounded like he had just developed the habit. It was untainted, youthful, and coolly confident. Chang always thought that he could tell a lot about someone by their voice and, comfortably, Chang had plenty of time to evaluate his new business partner from their phone conversation two days ago. Much to his disappointment however, Chang had decided that the owner of the cigarette and youthful voice was much more of a boy than a man. A decision that his arrogantly composed sentences, his exaggerated sinister tones, and his subtle underlying tone of…_desperation_ had made that abundantly clear. Chang could tell there was no real threat here. Just a ploy. A bold ploy of a foolish boy.

_A bad boy,_ Chang grinned secretly.

A fine trail of silver smoke weaved from the darkness as the stranger gave one more deliberate huff. Chang frowned, waving a hand across his nose, fanning the cloud away from his face

"You may be new here." He spoke flatly. "But the regulations of business remain as I stated over the phone. I need to know what you can offer before my services are given." He paused to smile. "It's just good business."

The red dot glowed brighter momentarily as the stranger took a casual drag before answering in a firm, decided tone. "The deaths of each and every Teen Titan." The red dot slowly spun in a circle as the cigarette was twirled in the stranger's long fingers. "Save one."

Chang's tilted his head. _A bold bad boy,_ he thought with another wry smile. He straightened in his chair fiddling with his gloves. "That task has been attempted and failed too many times, sir." He glanced from his hand to the red glowing dot. "…What makes you think that _you_ will be able to succeed?"

Another drawl from the cigarette, another puff of smoke, then, there was the sound of a zipper rapidly being drawn and something being removed from what sounded like a duffel bag. Chang was about to strain his neck to try to see what he was removing when something clattered onto his desk. Chang leaned forward.

"The communicator of Speedy. An honorary Titan, if I'm not mistaken."

Chang took it carefully into his hands, turning it over and raising his goggles to inspect it. It looked authentic. A quick flip of the screen confirmed it. This _was_ Speedy's communicator. He hadn't been lying. Chang gave a thoughtful hum and placed it back onto the table, resting back into his seat and tenting his fingers. "So, are you claiming that you've…"

Four more communicators clattered onto the table. One of them speckled with an ink-blot of dried, rusty blood. Despite everything, Chang's throat constricted.

_Jesus,_ he thought,_ he really killed them. Killed each one of them! _Chang's head whipped from the communicators back up to the glowing red dot. In response to this, the voice whispered again. "Is this good enough business, professor?"

Chang pushed himself up in his seat. "Who _are_ you?"

A pause. "You have my offer. You have my proof. Will you cooperate?."

Once again, Chang pushed himself back in his seat, his tongue irritably pushing against his cheek. _I really shouldn't…_

"Let me…see what you have."

The voice let out a quick, relieved sigh. "Thank you, Professor." It whispered, as a very pale hand slid into Chang's circle of light, holding a piece of paper. Just from looking at it, Chang could tell that the stranger had been holding it quite closely the entire time they'd been talking. With a huff, he snatched it and held in within an inch of his face with both hands, rearranging his goggles.

A pause.

"Impossible." Chang said firmly, seating himself back and sliding the paper back across the table. "I can't build that. It's improbable! The technologies required are…"

"So you cannot do it?" The voice asked softly, almost…fearfully. "Our deal…is off?"

Suddenly Chang stood up. He wasn't mad_ exactly_, but somehow…_something_ in that wishy-washy tone made him feel like a he felt distinctly mocked. This was nothing but a boy. A bad boy. It just wasn't good business.

"We didn't even have a deal in the first place!" He said sternly. "This was a waste of my time. Come back when you have a reasonable request!"

The figure sighed heavily, blowing another billow of smoke into Chang's face.

"Well, if that's the case, I'm afraid there won't be a next time, Professor."

Chang stopped and looked at the red glowing dot. Something had changed. The boy's words didn't sound youthful anymore. The naivety was gone. Suddenly, the bad boy sounded _older_._Meaner_.

The figure seemed to read his discomfort and explained. "You see, only my accomplices can know I'm here right now, I must keep a very low profile. I really cannot afford to be stopped right now." He spoke slowly, deliberately. He sounded so sad.

"I sorry Professor, but if you aren't an accomplice of mine, then you aren't _anybody's_."

He began to sit up.

"I'm so sorry, I really am."

"Wait!" Chang cried, still trying to grin, still trying to remain in control.

_He's just a bad boy…__He's all talk!_

"I can try it at least! For god's sake just sit down and we can talk about…!"

In less time than it took for Chang to finish his sentence, the figure leapt from his seat and thrust his hand towards Chang's head. The knobby white fingers enclosed around his face like a baseball glove, pressing up his nose and shoving his head back so it almost touched the top of his shoulders. The hand was dry and cold, like chilled leather, like a _cadaver_. Chang screamed angrily snatching at the figure's forearm, reaching for something vital, something he could scratch, but the overhead light was so bright…the only thing he _could_ see was the hazed outline of a figure perched on top of his desk, and for a moment, he could make out a wide brimmed hat. His head was pushed farther back still and the shadowy figure slinked leaned over the overhead light. For a brief instant, Chang thought he could see a face beneath it. A sickeningly pale, face hidden deep within the shadow of the hat. His skin was aglow in the light, like polished marble. Dark undertones of grey formed his high-cheek bones on either side of a long, thin nose, but the eyes were dark, they almost didn't seem to exist…like two ink smudges on the paper of his skin. Everything was just too bright for him to see clearly.

Still though…for some vague reason, Chang could tell that he _was_ handsome. A _boyish_ sort of handsome.

Suddenly, the grip loosened and Chang fell backwards, flipping over his chair and lying sprawled on the ground. The figure slowly slid back of the desk and began snatching the communicators back into the bag, muttering to himself. Chang threw himself to his feet, his hands cradling his face. "You have just made a very large mistake, stranger." He hissed.

The figure tilted his head, and took another drag, that infinitely sad look still shadowing his face. Chang pointed a thin knobby finger at the red light on the security panel. "You forget, you're locked in my lab. You have no way to get out, you little…" He stopped, as his eye twitched involuntarily, fluttering like an old fashioned movie projector. Although the man had released him, Chang could feel the pressure continuing to build. His eye twitched again, quickly followed by his cheek, twisting upwards in a repressed grin. The pressure continued to grow, feeling like either side of his head was caught in a vice.

"What the Hell did you do to me?" He screamed as his entire face began to spasm.

Chang let his hands claw at his face but it had gone numb, his fingernails ripping away his goggles which clattered to the floor and leaving two deep cuts along his cheeks. He felt nothing. Chang's face began to darken; first turning a rose pink until it was so red it his cheeks were almost black. He pitched himself from one side of the room to the other throwing his body against the walls trying to make the pain stop when suddenly, the left side of his face swelled outwards, like a marshmallow in a fire. His bloodshot eye bulged from the size of a golf ball to a baseball within seconds before the entire left side of Chang's face exploded like an egg hit by a slingshot. Blood, muscle, bone and brain matter splattered against like it like chum thrown from the bucket. Chang tried to speak, tried to move but half of his jaw was gone as well, snapped like a wishbone. The professor fell back into his seat, his head falling back and his arms swinging uselessly over the armrest like the pendulum in a grand-father clock, a trickle of blood running down it and dribbling from his finger tips. The last thing he remembered seeing was that blinding overhead light again…and a particularly funny thought that kept trickling down his thoughts with the rest of the inhabitants of his skull.

_Such a bad boy…such a bad bad boy…_

The room was silent for a moment, then Chang's last lungful of air came hissing from his exposed throat like a leaking balloon. The stranger slowly stood up, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and gently spreading it over what remained of the professor's head. "I'm…so, so sorry." He whispered before turning back towards the end of the room and zipping up the duffel bag once more. If Chang had been alive at that moment, he probably would have believed him.

As the man stood, the light in the ceiling caught off the surface of a dime sized ruby crystal embedded in the middle of the figure's forehead. He turned slowly towards the door, removing another piece of paper from his pocket and staring at the picture of the young girl who stood in the middle of it, dressed in blue, hood up, skin pale. After a moment he held it to his chest, gripping the picture so that it crinkled, his hands trembling slightly.

The only picture he had of her, the only clue he had to go on. "Oh, Raven…" He whispered, eyelids sliding slowly shut. "It's all for you, Raven. All for you."

Still clutching the picture he smiled, the corners of his mouth drawn upwards like hands on a puppet. "Soon…" He whispered, and the light illuminated the ruby once again as the end of the cigarette glowed. Three red dots. The man let the cigarette fall to the ground and stepped on it, rubbing his toe from side to side as he pocketed his beloved picture. Two red dots. He turned, his back to the light and to the splattered remains of the professor, picking up his duffle bag and beginning to whistle. One red dot. He placed his hand upon the control panel as casually as a hand print identification pad. It buzzed once and promptly crumpled in on itself like a beer can before exploding in a small plume of smoke. Moments later the door hissed open and the stranger coolly disappeared into the corridor, flicking off the light...

And…two miles away, across the city's harbor, across the choppy, white tipped waves and up the pathway to the gigantic 'T' structure illuminated against a glowing night sky…a girl awoke from her bed. She awoke _screaming_ as a matter or fact.

Author's Note: More coming soon.


	2. Chapter 2 That Nolstalgic Feeling

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted. Enjoy.

-Bert the Nomad

The day was the same as any other. The week…no different than the one before it. The sun rose and fell, the clouds rolled over each other, and the moon hung crescent in the bleak open sky like the Cheshire Cat's fading grin.

So normal…

But, somewhere out there…something was happening. Something…important.

She…just…knew it. She could _feel_ it.

On a non-too-important floor, behind a non-too-important window in Titan's Tower, a girl stood hidden behind her window. Beyond her, Jump City had already become aglow in the afternoon sun, the air carrying with it the slow bustling of car horns, gull calls, and waves ceaselessly breaking on rocks.

The girl stood, hood up, hands behind her back. Her eyes scanned the city once more from the darkness of her room, in the privacy of her hood, in the seclusion of her mind.

_Something is coming…_

She swallowed hard, glancing back to her bed, then to her bookshelf…then out to the city once more. Something was coming alright. Something responsible for giving her the dream last night. The nightmare that woke half the tower.

Her dream of fire, of fear, and of…Trigon.

It had been the first nightmare she'd had in over a year. Until now, there was nothing left to give her nightmares. Everything that had existed before was over with. Everything about her past was over and done with.

So why the nightmare?

Everything had returned to normal.

The city was safe, her friends were safe, her hood was back up, her cape was blue again, her privacy was…back to normal.

…back to normal...but she still kept her hood up. She still lived inside her room. Sure she had opportunity to play with her friends, leave the tower, put her books back on her shelf and live a little…but she never took them. Conceivably, she had every reason to be happy.

The girl's head slowly eased forward and rested against the glass. She looked at her feet.

"But I'm not."

_Something is out there. Maybe it's a storm…_

_xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx_

The school bell rung at 2:30 that day.

Instantly, Terra's head lifted from her desk, blinking from the 15-minute nap she'd sneaked in. With one hand slamming shut her respectable pillow of a textbook and the other sorely rubbing the back of her neck, she turned her gaze to the clock over the doorway.

"Two whole minutes early." She stated aloud, standing up from her seat. "Lucky day."

Terra slipped her books into her book bag, slinging them over her should and heading for the door. Robert and Roberta -her respected foster parents of five months as of yesterday, thank you _very_ much- were expecting her home early to mow the front lawn. They were nice enough. Simple. Suburban. God-fearing. Hunkered down in their white, square house in the smack-dab middle of the safest neighborhood in Jump dressed up in iron-pressed, pleated clothes and sitting around on plastic covered couches. Yeah, it'd taken some getting used to, but she'd down it. She'd allowed herself to become tamed. That's what you had to do nowadays in order to get by. Getting a collar slapped on her neck by Society was the greatest thing that had ever happened to her. Domestication meant _safety._ Sure, that collar may get tight at times, but as long as she wore it there would_ always_ be a hot dinner waiting for her at the dinner table, _always_ be a fresh pair of clothes folded and ironed at the foot of her bed every Wednesday and _always, **always**_ be someone there to wake you up and wish you good morning.

In other words: Collar equaled Security.

Sure there'd be sacrifices…but security was more important. When you had the collar, you don't get troubled by troublesome pasts. When you had the collar, you no longer need to be the one at the wheel all the time. When you had the collar, Fridays became the new Christmas. When-

Suddenly Terra's head went up.

Friday. Today was a Friday.

That meant-

-_Thunk-_

Something thudded against the window.

_"Te-e-e-e-e-e-e-erra!"_

Slowly, Terra's palm pressed against her forehead, her lips drawing back in a long bemoaning-

"Oh _Jeeeeeeez_…."

She'd forgotten today was Friday.

Friday was the day when a very particular stray dog would come and howl at her from over the fence of her yard. A stray dog with green fur and a single pointy tooth.

Fridays were the day that Beast Boy would come to visit.

Every Friday for the past 5 months she'd had the company of a little green bird, perched ever patiently on the branches outside the window to her seventh period classroom. She'd tried ignoring it, she'd tried _confronting_ it, hell, she'd done just about everything except kick off her shoes and land a hard one across his cheek. Nothing she did though, seemed to be able to break the message across. Despite the begging, the skirting, the dodging, the yelling…_nothing_ could make him see the collar she wore around her neck. Nothing could make him accept the fact that this white stallion had been tamed. Happily so as a matter of fact.

She glanced at the window as she strolled for the exit. He waved back, cupping his hands over his mouth and yelling through the glass.

_"Stay there! I'll be right in!"_

She shook her head, yelled back.

_"_Go away!"

He cocked his head and leaned forward on his branch, lifting a gray-gloved hand to his ear and squinting.

"_What did you say?"_

Terra's bosom heaved as she raised her voice, wind-milling with her arms. "I said go away! Leave me alone!"

Just what Beast Boy heard through the glass, Terra will never know, but with a grand smile and even bigger wave, Beast Boy eagerly nodded in response.

"_Gotcha! I'll be right in!"_

Before she could even respond he leapt from the branch, sprouting green wings and fluttering towards the school entrance.

Just…like…last time.

_Damn it…_Terra readjusted her backpack and turned towards the exit running two hands through her hair.

Old time Alzheimer-fogged friend or not, she was _not_ going to put herself through another session with Beast Boy.

She stepped out into the hallway, did a quick take towards the stairway, scanned the heads of the students for any green spiky tops, then made a move for the back exit. She got two steps down before she heard the doors explode open and a shout and could see the throng of teenagers ripple in half as a small, 5' foot even figure shoved his way through the crowd.

"Terra!" He yelled as he dodged and weaved between incoming students "Terra, wait up!".

Terra cleared her throat and quickly began to walk in the opposite direction, hoping somehow that the stream of children would somehow wash him downstream. Maybe. Somehow.

It didn't.

As soon as he saw her turn in the opposite direction, he leaped up and became the same bird he had been while perched outside her window and flittered over. None of the other students seemed to take much notice, for Beast Boy had been visiting the school every Friday for the past two semesters. Most of them had gotten used to random green animals running amuck in the hallways by now. Every Friday he'd just wait and wait outside her window, _just_ to give Terra a big ol' slap on the back. Just to say his 'hi's and hello's' in high hopes of-what? That's she'd throw down her books, tear off her color and go riding off into a golden sunset with him?

Jesus, she didn't even _want_ to imagine what that was doing for her social life.

Terra Markov; student, athlete, and eye candy to hormonal crime-fighting fauna. Just perfect.

The bird landed in front of Terra and within moments, she found herself staring at a little pointy white tooth sticking from the bottom lip of an abnormally large smile on the wide-eyed, scruffy haired face of the stubborn Teen Titan.

Terra, however, was frowning, her hands holding her books to her chest and her left hip sticking out slightly. "Hello, Beast Boy."

Beast Boy waved right back. "Well Hel-_lo_ to you too, Terra." He said a little too loosely. "I just wanted to stop by again to say my hi's and hello's."

"Well, looks like you've done a good job. Bye."

She brushed by with a noticeable nudge of the shoulder. Beast Boy morphed into a snake in an instant, slithering up in front of her and turning right back into his green, adolescent self only now, he had his serious face on. He took her arm.

"Terra, listen to me, it's important that I keep after you like this-"

She jerked away. "I would hope so."

"-because you _still_ are having memory lapses. You don't remember anything! Or you just won't let yourself remember! There's a very bad man out there and he might still be after you! You could be in danger."

"That could be taken as a threat you know." Terra said, though she didn't mean any of it. She knew that Beast Boy meant no harm. Despite that she'd _love _for him to take a long, hard hike over the tallest mountain…the last thing she wanted was to get him in trouble, or hurt him for that matter. The only thing she wanted to do right now was to go home, throw off her shoes, and read.

She smiled at him. "I really should get going now."

"Wait…" Beast Boy grabbed her arm again. "Then at least ask me why we can't still be friends? Just because you remember jack-diddily-squat about who you were, that doesn't mean that we can't be friends right? Can you tell me why you're being so distant? Why you don't think this can work?"

Terra was about to respond when a third, rather bubbly voice interrupted. "Ex-cuse me." It said. "Your Beast Boy, right?"

They both turned, only Terra recoiled.

"_Britney_?" She asked.

The red-haired girl named Britney standing across from the two didn't respond. Neither did the trio of giggling girls that huddled behind her.

Beast Boy's gaze shifted from one girl to the next before finally clearing his throat, distracted. "Uhm…yes?"

Britney leaned back and a heated exchange of snickers and whispers were exchanged.

Beast Boy took a slow, unsure step forward. "Can I…help you with something?"

After a moment, Britney straightened fished a pad of paper over to the changeling, blushing madly. "Do you think…you could sign this for us? All of us?"

A girl from behind leaned forward, whispering. "Have him write one for all of us." This comment was quickly followed by cheers, giggles and Britney's smile widening as she handed him a pink, glittery pen.

"Could you? You're all of our favorites. _Really_."

Beast Boy glanced down at the paper, then back over to Terra who's gaze had suddenly withered into the unimpressed gaze of a jaundiced old woman.

"Terra…" He began moving towards her but she broke him off with a shake of her head.

Still frowning, Terra pointed at Britney and her posse. '_That's__why_' she mouthed and turned and walked briskly down the hallway.

"Dammit." Beast Boy hissed, pushing the paper back at Britney. "Listen, I'll sign this later, I really gotta go. Stay in school."

He took off running as the girls' shoulders all sagged with a unanimous '_Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw'_.

He reached to top of the school stairs just as Terra was reaching the bottom. "Terra!" He yelled. "Terra, wait up! I still like you! I like you a _lot_! What happened back there was nothing! It wasn't a big deal!"

Terra stopped, but didn't turn around. She held her books tighter to her chest. "It _is_ a big deal, Beast Boy." She called back. "You're a nice boy and all but I don't think you realize what you're asking of me. I am who I am now. I don't want to be someone who _you_ said I was. You're a superhero, I'm a student. That's what we'll always be now. Jesus, can't you see that the fact that you _like_ me isn't enough to make this work? Relationships just don't work like that! You're lucky I still keep that communicator you gave me!"

Beast Boy said nothing so Terra finally turned around. She searched out his eyes and managed a smile. "You're a nice boy." She said again. "But I'm afraid that's all I'm going to see you as. I'm…sorry, but what you want just can't happen."

A brief pause, then…slowly, Terra turned towards the door. "I…I should go now. Robert and Roberta are expecting me."

Beast Boy just stood there, feeling something that'd been cooped up in his shoulders slowly dribble down to his feet.

He never thought that she would…but she had. She'd said it. Right to his face even. After all these Fridays. After all these visits. She'd said it.

That confirmed it.

He'd lost her.

"Well…" He said quietly. "I guess…I guess that I'll see you around then."

She smiled back to him. An honest smile. "Maybe." She said simply, turning on her heel and walking out the front doors.

Beast Boy watched her go, then felt himself slowly melt onto the stairs. A mental sponge in a puddle trying half-heartedly to absorb it all.

He sat there for the better part of ten minutes, ears drooped, arms against his knees, and his eyes admiring his feet. Although he thought that it'd be the pristine opportunity, he didn't really cry. Hell, he wasn't even that sad. His relationship with Terra had always seemed like setting up a long row of Dominos. Even if you finished setting them all up, the only thing you could do then would be to push them over and start over.

The only problem was that he quite frankly didn't feel like doing that again. Two times was enough.

His communicator went off.

Again, half-heartedly, Beast Boy flipped it open. From the small screen, Cyborg looked back at him with an expression that meant he had important news.

"_Hey, Beast Boy, you need to get back to the tower. Something happened in town last night. Robin has--"_

He stopped. Noted his team-mate's drooped ears, listless gaze, half-lidded eyes…and slowly sighed. Cyborg had always been a whiz at reading Beast Boy like an olive-bound book since he first met him. He could tell what had happened before Beast Boy spoke up.

"_She said 'no', didn't she?"_

"Yeah." Beast Boy said lamely. "Something like that."

"_You going to be okay?"_

"Well, she didn't try to bury me underground this time…so I guess it could be worse."

"_Yes it could. For example, Robin could find out that you haven't really been going out every Friday these past few months to follow a new '**lead'** you've come across in these murder cases and have **instead** been visiting the __Jump__City__High School__ to take sneak peeks at old girlfriends."_

Beast Boy almost grinned. "Screw you, buddy."

"_Yeah, that was in bad taste. I apologize. But I meant it when I said something important has happened."_

"What is it?"

"_Another murder."_

"Oh man, who was it this time?"

"_Professor Chang. And before you ask; **yes**, the **same** Professor Chang who built the gigantic Zinothium Cannon on top of the mountain overlooking the town and tried to vaporize us. We believe that from what the police are telling us, it looks like the same guy did it who did in the other two."_

"Gizmo and Control Freak? How can we tell it's the same guy?"

"_His signature. A black handkerchief left over the victim's faces. This guy's hitting all the technology flunkies in the entire city and is doing it before we can find any of them ourselves. We have no idea who he'll go after next."_

"Can't we just get Raven out in the field to take care of it? She's had those 'out-of-body' stake-outs before hasn't she?"

Cyborg paused on the other side of the line. When he spoke, he sounded concerned. More than usual. "_Raven…she's…been having some trouble concentrating again. You remember her nightmare last night?"_

Beast Boy rubbed the insides of his ears. "Yeesh, how could I forget_."_

"_Well, ever since then, I've been sort of worried about her. She's acting all…sad again."_

"Since when have you cared?"

"_Look, I'm just trying to say that we need you back at the Tower pronto. Robin thinks it's time we took a more serious approach to these murders. Get our hands dirty again. We haven't had contact with the Titans East for over a week and he's getting a little tense again. Everyone's been tense. If we can pull back together, we should be able to go out and find this guy together… cuz' I have a striking feeling that he's not going to come to any of us._"

"Wet-work, eh?"

Cyborg noticed that Beast Boy's expression hadn't changed. He sighed. "_Hey, B.B, are you sure you're feeling up to it? Not being able to get that girl you love is always a hard turn to take in life."_

"And what do you know about not getting the girl in the end?"

A pause.

"_Plenty. Now get down here."_

Beast Boy smirked "Rodger Captain Heart-Ache. Over and out."

Beast Boy flipped the communicator shut and stood up from the steps, dusting his pants off and giving a very long, tired sigh. What a day this one had been. What a helluva day.

He'd taken two steps down the stairs when his communicator went off again. With an eye-roll, he pulled it back out, pushing open the screen with his thumb. "Look, Cyborg, I was just kidding about the whole Captain Heart-Ache thing-"

"_Beast Boy…"_

It was Terra.

She'd called him again.

But Beast Boy's overwhelming sense of joy was quickly squalled by an equally overwhelming sense of confusion. The display screen was nothing but static, Terra's voice sounded so course and grainy coming through the speaker. But even with it, Beast Boy could tell something was wrong. She sounded piss-frightened.

"_Beast Boy…answer me…please. He says he'll kill me if you don't pick up…_"

With that last sentence Beast Boy's heart jumped up into his throat.

"Terra! Who's going to kill you? Where the hell are you? Terra? TERRA!?!?"

His fingers mashed buttons but the screen remained a snowstorm of static. Terra said nothing more, but Beast Boy could just detect a particular grunting sound being stifled, like a gag being stuffed into her mouth.

For a moment, the screen went silent. Beast Boy was just about to dial in for his friends when...

"_Beast Boy_." …Another voice shifted its way through the speakers. A boy's.

It sounded soft, unsure, with just the slightest hint of an unnamable accent tickling his tone. He sounded no older than him.

"_I am giving you one minute to get to Terra's house. I'm keeping count on the clock in her kitchen."_

Beast Boy felt his hands tighten on the communicator, his best efforts failing to stifle the fear in his throat. "Who is this? Who the hell is this?"

"_And I do have one of your communicators so I will be monitoring your frequencies. You cannot call your friends. You have one minute." _

The screen went blank.

Author's Note: More coming soon.


	3. Chapter 3 A Crimson Encounter

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted.

-Bert the Nomad

Forty-Five seconds later, chest heaving, communicator still wedged in a shaking hand, Beast Boy stood outside Terra's house. It was a standard run of the mill structure; single story, square windows, with a God awful paint job. It was located in a middle-class Suburbia with the skyskrapers of the major districts of Jump City outlined on the horizon. A white-washed picket fence and a line of neglected bushes separated neighboring houses with lawns covered in lawn ornaments and children's toys. Christ, it all looked so normal.

Beast Boy swallowed hard and over to a window at the far end of the house, next to a small row of ferns with what looked like an apple pie sitting on the sill. For a brow-furrowing moment, he was tempted to go through there. Slip in soundlessly, take this bastard by surprise and beat him into four months at the hospital with tubes in every hole in his body. Out think the bastard, use his powers to his advantage…just like he did with every other wanna-be villain with a hostage he'd overtaken.

He took two steps though, then stopped.

This wasn't some wanna-be villain, and there wasn't some scared faceless civilian in there as his hostage. It was Terra…and if he messed up, even _once_, she could wind up dead…only nothing would be able to bring her back.

He'll have to forget the gun's blazing approach until later. For now, he needed to follow his instructions. Go right through the front door nice and easy like, playing his game as he saw fit.

Hands trembling, Beast Boy ran towards the house, dodging around several garden gnomes and one persistent plastic flamingo before finally tearing open the front door.

Instantly, Beast Boy's eyes swept over the room. The door opened up into a hallway, two rooms on either side. There was an overturned table in the middle of the floor, along with an upturned rug and several broken frames of pictures that apparently had been knocked from the wall. What unsettled Beast Boy the most, though, was how unusually dark the house was, even though it was 3:00 in the afternoon, he couldn't even see what was at the end of the hallway.

"I'm here!" He yelled into the darkness. "I'm right here and I'm alone!"

Silence.

Beast glanced around the room again, took a cautions step forwards, teeth gritting. "You let Terra go now! She has nothing to do with this!"

"Neither…do you."

Beast Boy felt a good shiver run down his body as he heard the voice. It was definitely the same one from over the communicator, but somehow it felt…familiar. The way he slurred his words, a particular grain that scratched his tone…he could have sworn he had heard it before. Jesus, that unsettled him.

"What do you want?"

"Shut the door."

"I need proof that Terra's okay! Let me speak to her!"

Another pause…then a sharp_rip_ of duct tape being torn from flesh. Moments later, he heard Terra shouting. "RUN BEAST BOY! GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE! HE'S GONNA KILL Y-"

There was another rip of duct tape and her voice was muffled again. The voice spoke, utterly indifferent. "You have your proof. Shut the door."

Taking in a hissing breath, Beast Boy complied, slamming the door shut and casting the house into complete darkness. Probably not the smartest move…but this guy had Terra. Beast Boy was going to play by his rules until he made a mistake. Even though it was dark…Beast Boy just knew that this guy was still watching him. Somehow.

"Ten feet down the hall there is a lights switch to your left. Go to it."

Beast Boy did, his feet taking slow, long shuffles along the mangled carpet, his hand sweeping up and down the wall. He was tensed, ears straining in the dark. At the first hint of footfalls, the first possible sign that he'd separated himself from Terra…Beast Boy would be on him and the super-hero code of conduct be damned. He'd beat him within two inches of dismemberment.

As soon as he saw him…

He reached his tenth step just as his hands ran over the light switch. He took one last swallow,_ sounds like he's in the far end of the house. Probably barricaded behind a door._ He bit his tongue and flicked the switch. The hallway lights blinked on in an instant and Beast Boy suddenly realized that the voice was no longer at the far end of the house. It belonged to the man standing at the end of the hall.

Less than seven feet away.

Staring at him

Despite the fact that Beast Boy had been prepping himself for something exactly like this…he jumped. He jumped hard. His back collided with the edge of a small table, knocking off an expensive looking vase of flowers which promptly shattered on the floor. Beast Boy swore and steadied himself, his eyes never leaving the figure at the end of the hall.

His entire body was swathed in a gigantic black coat, a very _cheap_ looking black coat. Both cufflinks missing, a long tear running down the collar, and four buttons that'd appeared to have come from four different shirts. Long, fine black hair hung down to his shoulders, his face hidden beneath the brim of a very large black hat. His coat was unbuttoned and hung open to reveal an unequally unimpressive tank-top underneath, speckled with mud and dirt. Despite this though, the frame beneath these clothes looked sleek as a razor. This guy didn't look the type to hit the gym everyday, but he was definitely defined…like wrought iron cables lay bound beneath his icy-white skin.

A small stream of smoke trailed lazily from underneath his hat.

"Hello." He finally said in a reserved, quiet voice. It was a tone that Beast Boy couldn't decide was restrictedly angry...or just slack-jawed tired. Either way, he didn't waste time with words. This guy wasn't near Terra anymore. Bullshit time was over.

The man took two steps forwards, holding out his hands. "I'd first like to state that my actions are solely because of a contract. I don't want to do any of this. I can assure you that bec-"

He stopped as he suddenly ducked under the small table that Beast Boy had bumped against as it went soaring over his head, exploding against the far wall and knocking several pictures off the wall. From the other side of the hall, a green gorilla savagely beat his chest and charged. From under hat, the man smirked, spitting out his cigarette and bracing himself.

"Looks like you get the idea." He said quietly, and rolled out of the way as two large fists smashed against the floor where'd he'd been crouching moments before. He was on his feet in a moment, moving to take of his gloves but being forced to dive out of the way again as the twin horns of a bull impaled the rose-flower wall paper.

He landed less gracefully this time, rolling like a hula-hoop down the hall until his back finally collided with the door, rattling the hinges.

Beast Boy freed himself from the wall, turning back into human form. He stood defiantly between the man and the rest of the house, his expression absolute.

The man slowly stood up, righting himself and flinging his hair back over his head. His hat was off. Beast Boy could get a clear view of his face.

He stopped.

This 'man' wasn't a man at all. He was the same age as Beast Boy. He was a teenager. A _boy_.

His face was proud, angular, with a defined chin and a pair of large, thoughtful eyes as dark and undefined as ink splotches. The coloration of his face was a perfect unbroken contrast between the grey of his skin and the deep, dark ebony of his eyes and hair, interrupted only by two identical scars under each eyelid. They were prominent scars alright. Running from his eye to the bottom of his jaw line like a pair of crimson parenthesis. The skin around these scars were puckered. They looked like they'd been painful. Beast Boy glimpsed back into the boy's eyes and particular knowing gleam told him that the boy had been carrying them for most of his life. He glimpsed up past his eyes…and saw the diamond embedded in his forehead, glaring red in the bright light of the hallway.

Again, he stopped to stare. _Jesus, that looks just like-_

"You're staring." The boy said flatly.

Beast Boy snapped out of his stupor and almost openly apologized if he hadn't caught himself at the last minute. Composing himself, he huffed and cracked his knuckles. "Sorry, chum." He said. "I'll continue where I left off. Kicking your ass."

The boy straightened and removed his gloves, his eyes never leaving Beast Boy's. "If you insist." He muttered and struck a pose.

_A guy who knows Kung Fu._ Beast Boy thought grimly. _This just gets better and better._

Moments later, the boy was coming at him again, his face remained perfectly calm as he swept an open palmed hand towards Beast Boy's face, as if to slap him. Beast Boy threw his head back and cart wheeled back down the hall, turning into a bird in the middle of it and coming around in an arc. The boy's hand collided with the wall where Beast Boy's face had been moments before. Then, to Beast Boy's shock, the section of wall that he had touched exploded. Bits of plaster, wood, and insulation sprayed into the hallway, leaving a ragged two foot by two foot hole in the wall that went clean through into the other room, like the path of a cannonball. Beast Boy flittered over his head, swerving this way and that like a World War II fighter plane. Without even losing his momentum, the boy spun around and made another lunge at the little olive bird with his other hand. Beast Boy narrowly flipped out of the way and the boy's hand slapped against the door, which promptly was blasted clean of the hinges and sent flipping into the yard, crushing the plastic flamingo and catching the attention of several cars passing by.

Beast Boy remained a bird, flittering into the living room. The boy following, clearing overturned furniture and other obstacles without even checking his stride. Beast Boy dropped onto the sofa, becoming an emerald fox and darting out of the way moments before the boy's hands snatched the couch cushions, missing his tail by inches. The couch split in half, like a 2x4 being broken in a karate class, both ends lifting up and sending an explosion of feathers and bright yellow sponge into the room.

Beast Boy wheeled around and came at the man full on, leaping into the air as a swarthy bull-frog. The man stopped as the green amphibian went flying at him, then widened his eyes as the frog suddenly morphed into a kangaroo in mid-jump, both legs bucking out at him like a spring loaded punching-glove. The boy bent backwards, his spine bending like a contortionist, until his head almost touched the floor. Beast Boy sailed over without even grazing him, becoming a bird once again and flittering into the next room. The boy straightened himself, shaking his head.

"They _said_ you were unpredictable."

Beast Boy turned back into his normal self, landing in the kitchen on the other side of the hallway. He leaned heavily against the wall, his eyes trained on the door leading into the living room where the boy's voice was coming from.

_Note to self_ He thought grimly. _Don't let him touch you._

He was about to turn back into the fight when he suddenly heard a weeping sound, muffled and scared.

_Terra…_

He whipped his gaze in the other direction. Sitting at the table, nose bleeding, hands tied, and a good sized welt appearing on her cheek, Terra sat; her eyes star ridden with tears. A large piece of Duct Tape was stretched over her mouth but Beast Boy could still get an idea of what she was saying.

_Get out. Run away. Save yourself_.

Jesus, she was wanting him to leave her. Why the hell would-

Then Beast Boy noticed the two other people seated at the table. A middle aged man and woman; Terra's foster parents, both with equally sized holes in their stomachs, as if they had each swallowed a landmine. They lay sprawled in their seats, their chairs, the table and even the walls and ceilings had blood splattered on them, among other things that had erupted from their guts.

Over their faces, were two black handkerchiefs.

Beast Boy made one step for them, then caught a glimpse of something black from the corner of his eye.

He turned just in time to block a full round-house kick with his forearms as the boy made a wide sweep with his leg. The contact rattled both his arms like a plastic pipe and sent him stumbling back against the counter. He winced and glanced down at his arms, feeling them throbbing already. Jeez, this guy hit hard.

The boy's expression remained strangely resolved, almost sad even as he straightened from his kick and delivered a punch that split the overhead cabinet boards in half as Beast Boy ducked his out the way. He landed on the floor as a squirrel that charged between the strangers legs, morphing back into human form on the other end of the room, throwing himself to his feet and-

_FWAANG!_

A butcher's knife that'd been inserted in its block a moment before suddenly made contact with the wall less than an inch from Beast Boy's ear, sticking a good inch into the wall-paper and vibrating like a freshly plucked guitar string. Beast Boy let out a surprised shout and backpedaled a few steps, turning and glimpsing up to see the boy had already removed another knife from the block. A steak knife this time, with his other hand pulling more from the counter. His expression still mellow.

_You've gotta be kidding me…_

Beast Boy ducked again as the tip of a knife skewered a family picture of the new Markov family. He rolled along the floor, the hollow _thumps_ of knives sticking into walls sounding just a couple inches above him. He found cover behind a fallen chair, waited a moment as yet another knife thwacked against the backside of the seat, and jumped up into the air again, turning into a jade eagle. He got two flaps in and suddenly fell back to earth again, quickly turning back into a human and barking in pain. Something hot dribbled down his sleeve.

He glanced over at his arm, gritting his teeth.

Just a knick.

He sighed. A lucky shot. Nothing too serious.

He looked back at the boy as he made another reach for the knife block. He felt around for a minute, then frowned.

"Out already?" Beast Boy smirked, standing up. "Well I guess you're out of things to throw at-"

_PANG!_

Beast Boy's back collided with the wall as a large frying pan bounced off his forehead. He blinked twice and stuck a palm to his brow, wincing. "Me and my big mouth…" He sighed, shaking stars from his vision.

For the first time, the boy actually smiled and came at him again, bringing an arm sweeping towards Beast Boy's chin. The changeling blocked with his forearm again before lunging his head forward, suddenly sprouting the horns of a ram and making contact with the boy's face. He grunted, stumbled back, and leapt out of the way as the ram charged again, breaking into the oven and rattling several pots, pans, and cooking gloves from their racks.

Beast Boy righted himself, head throbbing, just in time to see an open palm flying towards his face. Beast Boy gasped and threw open the lid to the upper oven of the kitchen just in time. The boy's hand made contact with the glass with a loud _thwack_, that rattled the window. He glimpsed at Beast Boy for a second, the smirked. Beast Boy turned his gaze back to the hand just in time to see something surge out of the ivory palm, like small little bolts of black electricity. They crackled from his fingertips into the surface of the glass like a hundred individual lighting strikes before the entire glass window to the oven suddenly exploded and Beast Boy was once again backing up madly backwards as a multiple shards of glass hissed by his face.

The boy removed his hand and ran forward, delivering a very powerful kick towards Beast Boy's chest.

Beast Boy shook his vision clear and jumped, becoming an emerald gecko and crawled up the wall. The boy's blow hit nothing but the kitchen wall, blowing right through it like Styrofoam and burying his leg up to the knee.

He jerked once, twice, but couldn't budge. He sighed.

"Damned embarrassing." He muttered, giving another jerk.

Beast Boy crawled along the ceiling to the corner, where a large food cabinet stood. The boy followed him with his eyes as Beast Boy landed atop the large, heavy storage compartment and stared at him with large, gecko eyes. He realized his intention and let out a long heavy sigh.

"They _also_ said you were resourceful."

Beast Boy turned back into himself, seated on the very edge of the six foot tall food cabinet. He rocked himself forward. The cabinet tipped.

"You bet your ass I am." He grinned triumphantly and gave one last push, carrying the cabinet forward with a loud creak. Beast Boy leaped off at the last moment as the cabinet fell on the boy with a resounding crash that shook the overhead lamp and sent a box of strawberries rolling across the floor. Beast Boy straightened and glimpsed back at the wreckage.

"Down for the count." He smiled and turned, running over to Terra, who was sobbing hysterically, her chest heaving.

His smile quickly faded into a grimace as he tore off the tape and wrapped a hand around her shoulder. She didn't seem to be able to speak, her head lolled to the side as he shook her. She was gasping for air, her nose clogged with mucus.

"Terra!" He whispered. "C'mon, we have to get out of here!"

"Beast Boy?" She whispered. "He's…he's…"

"Don't worry." He smirked, glancing back to the cabinet. "He's taken care of. I'd be surprised if any man could shake off a blow like that any time soon." He grabbed her hands and was about to pull her from her seat when suddenly he felt a slight pressure on his shoulder. It wasn't powerful or uncomfortable; in fact, he didn't hurt it at all. It almost felt like a reassuring shoulder squeeze. Assuring, congratulating. But as Terra's eyes suddenly widened and her hands began to shake, Beast Boy knew what it was.

_Impossible…_

He suddenly felt a presence behind him, as the stranger's head was lowered next to his.

"I'm afraid…I'm not just any man."

Beast Boy felt his teeth grit, whirling around. The boy stood promptly in front of him, his dusty coat swinging restlessly from his shoulders. He was smiling.

Instantly, Beast Boy threw the boy's hand away and sent an enclosed fist flying directly at his nose.

His arm never got there.

Two inches from its target, his arm twitched in a suddenly painful spasm. Then, a deep set pain began to seep its way down his arm until it reached his fingertips. Tried to move…he really did, but his arm responded as much as a bag full of sand and glass.

Beast Boy winced and snatched at his shoulder. The pain began throbbing deep and rhythmic. Like an overheating shower, it became unbearable. The pain pulsed through his entire body, once…twice…thrice before he fell to the ground, clutching his shoulder as Terra began screaming. Tears stung the corners of Beast Boy's eyes, blurring his vision. He tried to shout…but he couldn't even talk. It hurt too damn much…

The boy was standing over him with that same, sad tired look. He removed a lighter and casually lit a cigarette. He slipped his gloves slowly back on and was about to apparently retrieve his hat when he noticed Beast Boy's gaze. With another sigh, he crouched down next to him, taking a long, thoughtful drag from his cigarette.

"You interrupted me earlier, you know." He whispered in his ear, small rivers of smoke slyly weaving between his lips. Beast Boy tried to move but the pain was too great, it held him fast like a hot iron cast. The boy continued, his voice as dead-pan as ever. "I said that I was only doing all this because I had to. I would never do that otherwise. I go out of my way to tell that to whoever I have to kill."

He stopped to take another drag.

"I told it to _them_" He said, removing his cigarette and using it to point to the still, dead forms of Terra's foster parents.

"I told it to _her_." He motioned to Terra who was now struggling vainly against her remaining bonds. "And now…" He said, placing the cigarette carefully back into his mouth. "I've mentioned it to _you_. You know what that means, right?"

Suddenly, Beast Boy's shoulder began to swell, puffing outwards like every single animal in his arsenal was trying to bust their way free from inside him. His expanding shoulder pressed against the side of his face, forcing it over.

Now…he could scream.

The boy stood up, walking over to the cabinet underneath the sink and pulling out some gauze. On his way back over he noticed one of the many strawberries scattered on the floor. He tilted his head, uttered a reasonable '_Hmmm_' and picked it up. "Y'know." He sighed. "I absolutely _love_ these things."

Beast Boy blanked out.

…

…

…

…

…

…

When he awoke, he was sitting in a chair.

His eyes rolled around the room and winced at the light overhead.

Bright as the sun. He looked away.

He tried to move…but every part of his body felt four times too heavy. He had trouble keeping his eyes open. He felt numb.

He let his gaze roll to the floor.

There was something lying in front of him, bent, like the letter "L". There was a pool of red around it.

He wasn't tied up but he felt too weak to move. He tried to run his hand over his face, try to clear his vision…but his arm was numb…he couldn't find it. Everything was numb.

He slowly lifted his other hand and felt for his other arm. Instead…he felt nothing but his waist.

The initial panic didn't set in at first. He trailed his hand up and down his side, trying to find his arm. Instead…everything just felt wet. Wet and cold.

Then…he remembered where he was.

He remembered everything. Terra, the boy, his arm…

…_his arm…_

He shook his head madly, his hand becoming desperate now, feeling all over the right side of his body, searching madly for what should be there. What had been there all of his life…

His hand finally enclosed around his shoulder. It had been bandaged…and slowly, he recognized the feel of gauze and duct tape. But no arm.

His vision finally cleared enough to see the object that was lying on the floor. It was an arm, with green skin, splattered with red droplets of blood. His eyes slowly trailed up it, but where the arm should have connected with the shoulder, was an ugly oval of tattered, ruined flesh.

Beast Boy's arm was gone.

"You're awake." The voice said. "I can only hope that the drugs are working. You shouldn't be feeling _anything_ right now."

Beast Boy couldn't scream, he felt too weak. Moving hurt. _Breathing_ hurt.

The boy was sitting across from him at the table, tilting his head and puffing on cigarette. Terra was seated in his lap, coughing feebly. The boy had one hand around her waist, the other covering her mouth.

"Now." He stated simply. "We talk."

Ending Author's Note: Review if you like it!


	4. Chapter 4 Amid Oneself

Author's Note: Revised chapter.

-Bert the Nomad

Meditation.

Like alcohol…it was an acquired taste.

An acquired taste that not many are willing to spend the money on.

For Raven…the choice wasn't really one she'd made on her own. Like being the daughter to an alcoholic father, she was bound to pick up the habit whether she liked the taste or not.

Now…it was a habit that took an increasing amount of time to satisfy.

Almost like an addiction.

Raven spent so much time meditating she was beginning to become more acquainted with her emotions than her friends. What's worse, they were beginning to talk back a lot more than they'd used to. It was like sticking a bunch third graders into a class room with no teacher. Sooner or later they're going to be getting restless…and sooner or later one of them is bound to make trouble.

Particularly the _troubled_ student.

Raven was in her room, floating a good two feet from the ground with both legs crossed and head slightly tilted back, breathing only through her nostrils. She could feel her emotions all squabbling with her; Curiosity, Bravery…hell, even Joy was getting a little argumentative. What bothered Raven the most was the fact that she wasn't sure _what_ was rustling her feathers. What had them all so rowdy?

In any case, Raven had plenty of time to calm them down. A good four hours in fact.

Chang had been found with the left hemisphere of his brain replacing most of his wallpaper in his office. Although blood and guts were nothing new to Raven, she decided to let Robin handle this one. If any of their team could play the part of a magnifying glass wielding detective, none could do it quite like the Boy Wonder. Robin had spent a good number of years in Gotham, where the law was in black and white and most of the crime scenes were in red. In a weird sort of 'Robin' way…he loved solving murders.

Oh well. Boys will be boys and prodigies of the Dark Knight always have a hankering for the good ol' days.

In any case, it only meant that there was Cyborg and Starfire left to distract her.

"_So…"_ Raven said sternly to the pink, grinning optimistic representation of herself. "_I can have you're word that you won't be stirring up any more trouble?"_

Joy shrugged, her hands wrapped around her back and her weight absently shifting from one foot to the other. The two of them were situated in the darkness of Raven's mind again, floating amid countless red stars and drifting pieces of debris. Joy was one of the last emotions she had left to go.

At least this one wasn't noisy.

"_Ye-e-e-e-e-e-eah." _It responded, staring boredly at the sky. "_But I'm not the only one whose been stirring up trouble here, boss. A lot of us have been getting vibes again. **You** know what I'm talking about."_

Raven crossed her arms. _"No, I don't, and I care very little about what it is. I'm just here to make sure that you're not going to cause me any more bad dreams."_

"_Oh, I think you know whose been causing your bad dreams, boss."_ Joy said, raising an eyebrow and gesturing her head over her shoulder. Behind them, back turned, hood up…was Red Raven. Wrath. The troubled student.

Raven sighed. _"Believe me, I know."_

Joy grinned and leaned in. "_You worry WAY too much. You should seriously consider lightening up. Have you ever considered…y'know…**finding** somebody?"_

Raven gave Joy a very flat look and the pink girl stood back up, grinning and scratching the back of her head. "_I see your point. You call the shots._"

Raven huffed. "_Thank you. Now get out of here_."

"_Rodger Wilco! Happy Raven out!"_ Joy turned and dashed off, sticking her arms out and roaring like an airplane taking off.

Red Raven remained still.

"_You had the same dream last night."_ It whispered quietly as Joy finally disappeared. "_You just screamed this time._"

Raven's face remained blank as she floated over to face her longest…and most terrible companion. The Red Raven had been with her for as long as she could remember, hovering on the edge of her consciousness like spots burned into her sight from staring at the sun for too long. Its words had accompanied her every thought, its whispers lingering in her dreams, and its four gleaming eyes haunting the darkness of her mind. Logically…Raven thought that it'd should have disappeared when Trigon was killed. Laid down and died with her past.

Why didn't it disappear? Why did it remain to taunt her with riddles and bad dreams?

"_What are you trying to tell me?"_ Raven whispered to it. _"What do you want?"_

The crimson hood glimpsed up and four gleaming red eyes stared back, like stoked coals. It's tone carried a cloying sweetness. "_I want what's best for you, Raven. I always have."_

"_What is it? What do you want me to see?"_

The crimson hood tilted, almost thoughtfully. "_I've…known you you're entire life, Raven. You know I have."_

Raven swallowed. Wrath continued, leisurely.

"_With all those years that'd passed…I've watched you grow from a wincing, small child up to a strong, obedient young woman. I've been with you in you're hard times…you're good times…and you're lonesome times."_

"_Stop it. You're nothing to me."_

The eyes narrowed, looking hurt. "_Now Raven, that's just not fair to say. I am part of you. It's impossible for you to exist without me. I am everything to you…and you are everything to me."_

It paused to move closer to Raven, slipping its hood off and taking her shoulder. Wrath's face was smiling…its four red eyes narrowed sympathetically.

It looked so much like her…

"_Raven…you're a lost dove. You have nowhere left to fly to. You've knocked over the nest that had birthed you, raised you, **protected** you for all these years…and now fly around aimlessly in hopes of finding another nest that'll welcome you. **That's** why you're not happy Raven. **That's** why you sit in here day after day, sitting at your window and wishing for something wonderful to happen to you. You're in denial. You can't except the fact that you should be dead…"_

Raven snatched Wrath's and hand and pushed it away, standing up over the Red, glowering personification. "_You're wrong, Wrath." _She said, quietly. The Red Raven bared its teeth as she continued. "_I may have outlived my purpose…but I still have a home full of people who accept me and love me. I'm not going to lie to you, Wrath. I am not happy. But I know for a fact that it's not something **you** can solve. You are as worthless to me as anything else in my past. You have no power over me. If there's a lost dove here, it's you."_

Wrath slowly straightened, pulling its hood back up. It was smiling. "_Oh Raven." _It whispered. _"There are still things about your past…that you still know so little about. Maybe you should try holding onto the dreams I send you. You might just remember something. Something wonderful."_

Moments later the Red Raven sat back down, its four gleaming eyes absently watching the stars.

"_You fly back home now, Raven."_ It whispered. "_I won't cause you any more grief today."_

Raven sighed and lowered her hood, turning slowly towards the Forbidden Portal, her exit out of her mind. Her job was finished for today. If there was one thing Red Raven didn't do, it was lie. Wrath had always kept its words…which made the last conversation very unsettling.

She stepped up in front of the portal, casting one last glance over her shoulder at the floating red cloak.

"_A real crab, that one."_ Joy said from above.

Raven glanced up, frowning. The Pink Raven stared back, sitting in the branches of a knurled ugly tree with both legs swinging carelessly over the edge. In her hand was a glowing strawberry.

"_Where the hell did you get that?" _Raven said, eying the pink girl as she levitated the fruit from one hand to the other.

"_Childhood memories."_ Joy said inattentively. "_I spend a lotta time there. It's the only place where Red isn't around."_

She caught the fruit and finally took a large bite out of it. "_Oh_!" She moaned, rolling back her eyes and leaning back on the branch. "_These are to **die** for, Raven. I can see why they're your favorite fruit."_

"_They're not."_ Raven frowned again, and walked through the portal.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The boy sat at the table, waiting very calmly as Beast Boy screamed again, his head thrashing from side to side, feet kicking up the carpet, and his remaining hand tearing at the rounded crater that used to be his arm. Beast Boy was freezing, he'd never felt so damn _cold_ and _wet;_ like buckets of ice-water being continuously poured over his chest.

He was so scared. Scared to the point that he didn't care about _anything_. The bile that he coughed up, the wet spot on the crotch of his pants, his pleas for his mother…all meant nothing to him now. All he could do now was cry. And he did. And so did Terra, even through her newly administered gag.

The boy had waited. His face completely blank. Almost as if he wasn't even paying attention. Finally, he blinked and leaned forward. "If you move around, it just hurts more. Please remain still, for both our sakes don't make it worse."

Beast Boy didn't answer, he just lurched forward in his seat and tried to puke something up. Nothing came. Nothing was left.

The boy grimaced and straightened, his grip still firmly holding onto the kicking, bucking Terra. "You're going into shock right now. I know, trust me, I know. First you'll feel light-headed, then drowsy. You're going to want to fall asleep but I can't let you. Not yet. I need you to just tell me something first."

Again Beast Boy didn't answer. He would have spat at him if his mouth hadn't felt like he had been sucking on cotton for the past hour. He raised himself slightly, then fell back in his seat, dry-heaving again. Something came up this time.

Beast Boy suddenly tasted blood.

The boy straightened at this, his black eyes sharpening. "Oh, no." He whispered, straightening from his seat and striding over to Beast Boy in an instant, yanking out a faded, black handkerchief. "Internal bleeding…I overdid it again…" He looked so genuinely concerned, so legitimately afraid. What a funny kid.

Terra made a move to run, but her legs were still tightly bound to a chair. She only succeeded in falling over.

The boy knelt in front of Beast Boy and gently held the handkerchief to his mouth as red began leaking from between his teeth. Beast Boy eyed the black handkerchief with his half lidded eyes, coughing feebly.

_The black handkerchief…_ He thought through drooping lids. _The killer's trademark. _

He glimpsed up slowly to the boy's black eyes, which were fixed on wiping the bubbling blood from his chin. "You're…the killer." He managed to say, a fresh stream of red dribbling from the corner of his mouth.

The boy stopped, glimpsing up at Beast Boy's hazed green eyes with his sharp, deep black ones. For a moment, Beast Boy thought he could see them soften, a momentary fleeting spark of regret, pain…and sadness. God, he looked _so_ sad in that moment. As if nothing in the world could possibly save him...and he knew it.

He glanced away, then resumed his duties. "Yes." He said quietly, inspecting Beast Boy's wound. "Yes I am."

Beast Boy huffed quickly through his nose. It was the closest thing he could do to express a laugh.

_We've spent the past three weeks hunting down a killer and here I am getting catered by him,_ He smiled vaguely as the boy lifted the crimson bandages and inspected the wound. He let his eyes close and his jaw clench shut. "You overdid it again." He hissed to himself, then raised his gaze to Beast Boy's. "Are you feeling well enough to tell me something, Beast Boy?" He knelt down and placed a hand under Beast Boy's chin, raising his head. "I need you to tell me something important. Oh, so very important."

"Why…why are you…"

"I need you to tell me something about a friend of yours. You know her as Raven."

"…R-Raven?"

"Look at me, Beast Boy, keep your eyes on mine. I need you to tell me how I can get inside the tower. Do you hear that?"

"Why…Raven…?"

"_Please_! Stay with me! I need you to tell me!"

"But…Raven…she's…"

The hands dropped from Beast Boy's face and gripped his collar. The next thing he knew, Beast Boy was off the ground. He felt like he was flying. The room spun like a carousel, his eyes dropping from focus. More blood filled his mouth.

"Tell me." The boy hissed and suddenly, he didn't sound sad anymore. His voice had gotten tighter. _Angrier_._Scarier._

"Tell me how to get into the tower!"

Somehow…Beast Boy managed to grin, rolling his head to get a good look at the boy. He mustered a shrug.

"How…about…no."

The boy bared his teeth and with an angry shout, shoved Beast Boy back into his chair.

Beast Boy's head whip-lashed over the back, his weight carrying him and the chair backwards until the boy's fist balled up under Beast Boy's collar once again, holding him in place. "I'm not afraid to do what I must. If you won't answer me for your sake…"

He yanked off a glove with his teeth and strode back over to Terra, grasping her by her throat with his bare hand, lifting both the girl and the seat off the ground. "…then answer for_hers_. If you don't answer me, I swear to you I'll blow one piece off her at a time."

Terra's star-ridden eyes widened, her gaze switching back and forth between Beast Boy and the boy holding her. Her face began to redden, a thin vein appearing along her temple as the boy squeezed harder.

"I'll do it." He whispered. "Perhaps I'll start with her fingers. She's got plenty of those."

Despite everything, Beast Boy felt something in his body seize up. "Terra…" He whispered, wrapping a hand around his stomach. "Don't…hurt Terra!"

"Then tell me how to get into the tower! It has a security system! I need a way to bypass it!"

Terra let out a strangled sob from beneath the duct tape, bucking and kicking in the boy's iron grasp.

"Terra…" He whispered again. "I…I can't. I won't."

The boy's face trembled. "So be it."

With a jerk of his hand, he released Terra. Her chair clattered to the floor, sending her head bouncing like a bobble-head. Before the chair even settled, the boy seized one of her arms and tore it viciously from the duct tape bonds, pulling it out onto the table and leaning over it like a chef inspecting a slab of beef. Terra pulled back, her muffled screams echoing through the duct tape over her mouth. The boy held his hand out over the girl's arm, turning to Beast Boy again. His face looked frightening.

"At the elbow…" He said, gesturing with his hands. "Or perhaps at the shoulder. You should know what that feels like. You can tell me what I want, or she will be mutilated for the rest of her _life_ because of poor judgment."

Beast Boy didn't respond. He kept his jaw clenched shut, his guts tightening like a wringed towel.

He…really…shouldn't tell. "I…can't…say."

Again the boy's face tightened. "The entire damn arm then."

His moved down around Terra's shoulder in a deathly tight grip. The girl let out one more muffled shriek and glued her eyes shut.

"_Zero…five…nine…eight…six…four_…"

The boy glanced up. Terra's eyes opened. Her shoulder was released.

"_Two…nine…six…three…five…five…n-nine."_Beast Boy's face was buried in his palm, his teeth gritting. The world was fogging up again. It all was too much. He couldn't move, couldn't feel, could hardly even realize that he was dying.

Dying…

Actually, truly _dying_.

"That's…the combination…for the tower. You'll need…handprint. The access code…is also on my…communicator. The password…" He coughed, and slumped back in his seat, gargling on mucus, blood, and shame. "The password is…Terra159. The…password…" He couldn't continue. He was too tired. So _very_, very tired. His head rolled back and he gave one last, heaving breath, then drifted off into shock.

The boy stood up, tossing Terra aside. "Thank you." He said quietly. "Thank you _so_ much."

Beast Boy said nothing. His entire left side was caked in dried blood, his mouth bubbling, his eyes glazing. He said nothing. He wanted to…but he couldn't. He was dying, after all. He didn't want his last words to be betraying the tower's security mainframe. But…it was too late now. He was almost unconscious now. After that, he had nowhere to go but up.

The boy walked over and knelt down in front of him as the light from the overhead lamp slowly began to grow ever brighter, encompassing all sights, sounds and smells.

"It's okay now." The voice whispered. "Go to your paradise. And I'll go to mine." He smiled in a heart-breaking way. "Goodbye, Beast-"

Suddenly, there was an abrupt whine of blue plasma as bright blue beam exploded in front of Beast Boy's eyes. The boy let out a loud, surprised yell as he was blown through the air and out the kitchen window, propelled by the pulsating beam like a cork shot from a shaken Champaign bottle. The last thing Beast Boy saw before lapsing into unconsciousness was a large man standing at the opposite side of the room, his arm upraised and thin stream of smoke trailing from the cannon that had replaced his forearm and fist. The cannon quickly fell in upon itself, rearranging into a metallic hand. "Beast Boy!" Cyborg yelled.

Author's Note: Hope you liked it. Just a couple changes from the original, hopefully for the best. Fair thee well, everybody!

-Bert the Nomad.


	5. Chapter 5 The Nobody

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Cyborg had seen blood before.

In fact, he had seen a _lot_ of blood before.

Flashbacks to the chaotic surgery that had given him the body that he had now let would never let him forget how much blood a body contains. It can coat walls. It can stain clothing. It can get absolutely_everywhere_.

Cyborg had seen it do all of this. He still got nightmares about it at times.

With all that blood staining his memories…one would think that he'd have the strength to stomach what he saw in Terra's living room.

But for some reason…he couldn't. Not this time.

Maybe it was the fact that it had been his _own_ blood in those memories.

The blood that was splattered against the walls, dripping from the ceiling, and pooling across the floor _wasn't_ his.

It belonged to the small green, hunched-over figure that looked seconds from falling out of his seat. Beast Boy didn't even seem to have enough strength to even _look_ at him. His skin was as shiny as freshly dried wax, his eyes rolled over and glazed.

All that blood had come from him. Beast Boy. The same Beast Boy he'd talked to on the communicator less than an hour ago. It'd…all come from him.

All that blood…

For some reason, the notion terrified him. Made him feel sick.

Seeing your own body mutilated is one thing. Seeing one of your closest friends in the same condition is a different story entirely.

Just from looking at him, Cyborg feared that he'd come too late. Beast Boy didn't appear to be moving. Didn't appear to be breathing. Blood, bile, and mucus coated his entire collar and chest like the bib of a two year old after dinner.

He looked _so_ dead. As dead as they come.

After Beast Boy had failed to return back to the tower in over twenty minutes after their last conversation, Cyborg had used Beast Boy's communicator to track him back to Terra's house. He almost convinced Starfire to come with him, if only for the possibility they'd stumble into Terra's house and find the two of them making out in some back closet and have Starfire quip in with a standard Tamaranian remark that'd have both Terra and Beast Boy blushing their asses off while Cyborg laughed off his.

He'd even been _hoping_ for it even, more or less to confirm that things had cleared up between Terra and Beast Boy. Lord knew that his team-mate _deserved_ a second chance at love…and Terra's return had been the golden opportunity usually only found in bad Romance novels.

Now…he could be dead. No more jokes, no more laughs, no more-

_No._ Cyborg shook his head. _There is no way in hell that Beast Boy is dead. There is no way in hell I'm going to let him._

Cyborg crossed the room in an instant, flinging aside a chair and skidding in front of Beast Boy with a nose-wrinkling grimace. His electronic eye scanned him over two times over while he lowered his ear to his chest.

"C'mon BB." He whispered. "I know there's still something in yah. Don't you even _think_ about dying."

…

…

…

Nothing.

Cyborg might of well had is ear pressed up against a bag of wet dirt.

No heart-beat.

No breaths

Cyborg gritted his teeth._ C'mon, dammit. I know there's something in there, there's gotta something in there. _

Then Cyborg saw the mound of crimson gauze covering Beast Boy's shoulder. He raised his head. "Oh no…" He whispered. His eyes trailed down to the floor…and saw Beast Boy's arm. Palm open, muscles tensed, wound raw and red. "Oh, Beast Boy…" Cyborg whispered, then gritted his teeth and pressed his ear against Beast Boy's chest again. His throat became tight. It hurt to talk. He did anyway.

"You can't be dead. You hear me, BB? I'll kick your sorry green ass if you so much as _think_ about it! You got that? That arm is no god damn excuse. No god damn excuse at all! You're not dead!"

…_thump-thump…_

A heart-beat.

Cyborg froze.

…_thump-thump…_

Another.

Faint, weak, but _there_.

Cyborg must not have heard it the first time. Maybe it just started up right now. It didn't matter. Beast Boy was _alive_. He _knew_ it. Fuckin' _knew_ it!

Cyborg shook his head. "_Thank Jesus_…" he whispered, throwing his arms around Beast Boy, his hand taking in a handful of his hair.

"I need you to hold on now." He whispered, yanking off the belt from the pants of Terra's foster-father and yanking it tightly around the stub of Beast Boy's arm. "Hold on _real_ tight. Help is on the way."

Something knocked over a chair behind him. Cyborg glanced over his shoulder and was met with the glinting blue eyes of Terra's, glowing red and wet.

"Terra!" Cyborg jumped up and dashed over, yanking off the duct tape over her mouth and around her legs. As soon as the tape was off, she jumped him, wrapping her arms around his chest and bawling. Bawling her eyes out.

Her words were choked with sobs, her breaths as rhythmic as a machine gun.

"_Thank god…thank god you came…oh, thank god…I was so scared…I was just so scared I…"_

Cyborg pulled her away, holding her roughly by the shoulders.

"Are you hurt?" He asked tightly.

Terra shook her head, dragging a sleeve under her nose. "No…no I'm fine. Beast Boy's the one you need to help! You have to help him! He'll die if you don't!"

_Thank you for the update…_

Cyborg shushed her once and shoved her communicator into her chest, pushing her back into a chair. "Call for help." He said quickly. "Get out of the house and call for help."

"But I…"

"GO!"

"Beast Boy, he's"

"NOW!"

Biting her lip, Terra shot one last gaze down at her communicator, then back at Cyborg. "Save him." She whispered again, then dashed out of the room, flipping the communicator open.

Cyborg watched her go then whipped back down in front of Beast Boy again. It was clear that Beast Boy was unconscious… but Cyborg talked to him anyway. If anything, to keep him listening to something. To keep him _here_.

To be honest…it helped _him_ just as much.

"Alright, BB." He whispered, picking the changeling up from his chair and gently easing him down on the table. "Just hold tight now. It's all gonna be alright."

He stood up for a moment, his mind racing. There were medical steps he should go through…medical steps he remembered from his days at the hospital. First aid tips, procedures, methods…god dammit, what were the ones for _blood loss_?

_Step one…neutralize area of blood-loss…right? I gotta make sure he's not still bleeding. _

Cyborg leaned over and peeked under the gauze taped over the wound.

It still looked so raw…so tattered…so _red_.

Cyborg had never witnessed Beast Boy bleed in his _life_. Seeing so much red on his person didn't even seem _possible_.

But the wound had stopped bleeding…for the most part at least. The tattered flesh just stared up at him, like canned crimson tuna-fish. Cyborg grimaced, tightened the belt, and desperately tried to remember step two.

"Step two..." He said allowed. "…dress the wound…keep victim from going into shock."

He glimpsed down at the wound again, then to Beast Boy's face. "Shit, he's already _in_ shock. I don't remember what I'm supposed to do for shock! What the hell do I do for shock?"

_Calm down first. You're the only think keeping him alive right now. You know what you have to do for shock. You've been in shock. What did they do for you? Remember dammit!_

Cyborg closed his eyes and breathed heavily through his nostrils.

"…"

"…"

"First step…is to make sure victim is able to breath. Check for vomiting or any other signs of liquids clogging the airways."

Cyborg swallowed, turning back to Beast Boy and the foamy red blood dribbling over the corner of his mouth.

_That qualifies._ Cyborg thought, and continued. "If so…turn victim to on their side, to prevent choking." He did so, easing Beast Boy over, his ruined shoulder facing the ceiling. Cyborg then leaned in next to his mouth, heard breathing, and leaned back up, sighing heavily.

"…step two…is…something about elevating the feet. Elevate the feet. Something about circulation. Jesus, there's got to be something around here I can use."

He glanced around the kitchen, muttering to himself like a pack-rat looking for the remote. "Elevate the feet…something to elevate the feet…"

His eyes finally came across several cereal boxes and a box of graham crackers. "What the hell." He muttered and snatched them up in an instant, lifting Beast Boy's boots and sliding all three boxes under.

One of them was a box of Lucky Charms. Jesus, if there was a time for a cereal to live up to its name...

Cyborg took another two steps back, plastering his hands over his scalp looking over his work. Beast Boy didn't move, his remaining arm hanging loosely over the side of the table. "Oh, Jesus…" Cyborg hissed, leaning in and checking Beast Boy's heart-beat again.

…

…_thump-thump…_

…_thump-thump…_

Still there.

Still beating.

Cyborg sighed, snatching the gauze back up again and pushing it down on the stump of Beast Boy's arm. "You're gonna make it." He whispered. "You're gonna make it through this. I'm just going to get a few more things to put over you're arm now, okay?"

He glanced downwards at a black cloth lying crumpled at his feet, stuck in a sticky puddle of dried blood. "That'll work." Cyborg said and quickly leaned down to pick it up.

It was a handkerchief.

A black handkerchief.

Cyborg stopped as something clicked in his head. Slowly, his jaw began working, as if chewing on a thick leather belt. He glanced over his shoulder at Terra's foster-parents still propped up in their seats.

Two black handkerchiefs of either of their faces. Same as Chang. Same as the others.

_He did this._ Cyborg realized, turning back and gritting his teeth. _The same son of a bitch did this…_

As if prompted, the back door opened and a tall, black figure casually stepped in, as if he hadn't of just been blown through a window. He carelessly wiped some broken glass from his shoulder, the front of his shirt now sporting a large, circular burn.

"That…hurt." He said matter-or-factly.

Cyborg was on his feet in an instant, standing defiantly between Beast Boy and the boy in the doorway. His arm was reformed into his sonic cannon, his legs spread in a police-man's firing stance. His face was rigid.

"You're the killer." He said, sighting down the barrel with a squinting growl. "You're the one we've been hunting."

The boy tossed back his hair, rubbing his temple while his other hand casually pulled a cigarette out from some unseen pocket. "You know, you're little green friend asked me the exact same thing. You're quite a witty little bunch, you Titans."

"Put your hands up."

He placed the cigarette in his mouth and padded his pockets for a lighter. Not finding one, he sighed. "Damn. Must have dropped it."

"Put your hands up or I'll shoot."

The boy removed the cigarette from his mouth, flicking it over his shoulder and giving Cyborg a resentful head-shake.

"You're not going to shoot me." He sighed. "You're not going to risk a fight in here with you're friend on the table." He glanced from Beast Boy, then over to Cyborg. "In fact, all I'm asking is that you let me collect my things. Let me get them and I'll be on my way. Simple as that."

Cyborg felt his teeth grit again as his eyes drifted back over to Beast Boy, his feet propped up under a box of Wheaties and Lucky Charms, the edge of his shoulder swathed in dirty maroon gauze and tape, his breaths bubbling in the back of his throat like a tired, leaking motor.

God_damn_ it. The boy was right. Cyborg _wouldn't_ be willing to start a fight. Not while Beast Boy was in such critical condition. Not after all he'd been through. Not when help was so close.

The boy observed Cyborg's indecision and raised his hands. "I assure you. I just need two things."

Cyborg took two more defensive steps towards Beast Boy, the boy's head still in his cross-hairs. "Go get them. And keep your hands where I can see them. Move."

The boy bowed graciously. "They _said_ you were reasonable." He said, taking several long, slow strides into the room, his arms still up. Cyborg kept his sights trained on him, circling around the table to always put a barrier between Beast Boy and the boy.

The boy stopped at the chair Beast Boy had been seated at and knelt down and grabbed the sleeve of Beast Boy's dismembered arm. He hefted it as casually as luggage, tucking it under his arm and standing back up. Something about his casualness almost made Cyborg fire…but he controlled himself, biting his tongue instead. Biting it _hard_.

The boy stopped at the edge of the counter, next to an overturned food cabinet and a smashed oven. He reached for something that had fallen beneath a box of pancake mix. He held it up, dusting batter off it.

Beast Boy's communicator.

"Stop!" Cyborg barked, taking a more focused aim down the barrel of his arm.

The boy glanced up surprised. He blinked stupidly. "What?" He asked.

"The communicator. Why do you need it?"

The boy glanced down at the communicator, then back up to Cyborg. He looked distressed. "I…can't tell you."

Cyborg's sonic cannon charged up with a high-pitched _whirring_ sound. "Then put it down."

The boy inhaled slowly through his nostrils, closing his eyes. "Look." He whispered. "I'm begging you. I need it. I truly _need_ it. If my word means anything to you, then believe me when I say that no harm will come of your friends as a result of it."

"You've already _harmed_ one of my friends."

Again, that distressed look. "I had to. That's the only reason I did it! That's the only reason for all those deaths! Oh, if you only_knew_!"

"Yeah. If only. Now put it down."

"You won't shoot."

"I will if I have to."

The boy regarded him for a moment, shook his head. "I don't believe you." And started to place the communicator into his pocket.

_BLAM!_

Cyborg's shot exploded through the section of wall less than a foot above the stranger's head.

The boy winced.

"Believe it." Cyborg said simply, aiming the cannon back to its original target.

The boy's eyes were squeezed shut, his teeth bared as bits of plaster, isolation, and wood came raining down from the hole over his head. "You don't understand." The boy whispered. "You…just…don't…_understand_."

Cyborg huffed. "Understand _what_? Your logic? Your morals? Your fuckin' _ethics_? Is that what I'm not '_understanding_' here?"

The boy's expression continued to darken. "No." He said, opening his black, inky eyes open again. In the flickering light of the kitchen, they almost looked as if they were _simmering_, like two boiling pools of oil. The boy's face was livid.

"You're not _understanding_ the fact that I'm _not_ a _bad_ person. The fact that I don't _like_ killing. The fact that I've been searching for something all of my_life_…and now have an opportunity to grasp it..." He paused, lowering his head for a moment. "…and the fact that I'm willing to do absolutely _anything_…to get it."

He took a definite step forward. "_Anything_."

Cyborg blinked, glanced over his shoulder at Beast Boy, then forward again. He smiled.

"I see." He said quietly.

And fired.

The boy's hand was up in a fraction of a second, his voice suddenly booming. "_Azarath, Metrion, ZINTHOS!"_

Instantly, a wall of black exploded from the ground, flying to the ceiling and expanding from wall to wall before Cyborg's shot even reached it. The beam hit the obsidian barrier and reflected like a ball from the bat, punching a hole clean through the ceiling, through the second story, and into the afternoon sky with a raucous explosion of debris, dust, and smoke.

The boy's hands closed and the shield fell in upon itself like black tin-foil, reforming into a spear which he grasped. He hefted over his shoulder, took two bouncing steps, and hurled it directly at Cyborg's chest.

It was a perfect shot. Cyborg was hit.

_Hard_.

Before he could even get his bearings, the metal Titan was against the far wall; a good two feet off the floor and about a good foot _into_ the wall. The obsidian spear of energy quickly oozed down the shaft and spread like a fueled fire across Cyborg's entire body, locking him in place.

The boy kept his hand raised, taking several long, leisurely strides over to the struggling Cyborg. He had a sad look again.

Cyborg strained his head, looking down at the boy with a gritted, tensed grunt. "Who…the hell…_are_ you?"

The boy slowly pocketed the communicator and stared slowly back up at Cyborg, fist still raised.

"I…am nobody." He said quietly. "I am a shadow. A memory. A lost, lonely black-bird without comfort nor nest." He paused, a particularly _wistful_ tone suddenly lofting into his words. "And so is the one I seek."

Distantly, Cyborg thought he could hear sirens somewhere down the street. Ambulance _and_ police sirens.

The boy's ears perked up and his gaze turned towards the door. He'd heard them too. He studied the air for a moment, then his gaze lowered back to Cyborg's. "I have to go now." He said flatly. "I shall promise you again that no harm shall come to any more of your friends as long as you stay out of my way. If you just do this…" He stopped to swallow, almost nervously. "…then the_next_ time you see me…shall be the _last_ time you'll see me."

With one last weak grin, the boy turned and walked out the door, holding out his hand and summoning his hat from the rubble of the house. He flung open the door, casting one last forlorn glance to Beast Boy on the table. He stopped for a moment, dusting his hat off and speaking lightly over his shoulder to Cyborg.

"I'm glad you came when you did." He said, securing his hat once again over his head. "I envy the friendship you have. I'm glad that you were able to save it. It's so important to hang onto those things."

Then, with a flourish of his coat, the door slapped shut. From outside, Cyborg could clearly hear police cars opening from the front of the house and more than a few footsteps come clattering down the hallway.

The shield around Cyborg dissipated into a thin black smoke and Cyborg collapsed to the ground, feeling numb all over and very, very confused. At that very moment…he didn't know _what_ to think.

Cops and paramedics began flooding into the rooms, more car doors slammed, and more voices sounded through the house. White suits and blue suits ran by him on either side, radios buzzed, and Beast Boy was instantly surrounded by paramedics.

Cyborg felt a hand grasp his shoulder and an older, stern faced police officer kneeled down in front of him.

"Are you okay, son?" He asked dryly, scanning him up and down. "You look like hell."

Cyborg paid no attention. Tripping clumsily over his own feet, Cyborg pushed the man aside and stumbled across the room, flinging open the back door and running out into the small, grassy back-yard.

But…of course…the boy was gone.

Ending Author's Note: More coming


	6. Chapter 6 An Orange Tinted Paradise

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted

_Raven…_

Another dream…another nightmare…another vision.

_Raven…it's perfect…_

No images this time, no blood, no marks, just the voice…

_So perfect…_

It was dark…infinitely dark. She couldn't move…she couldn't even breathe, but she didn't need to breath, like a baby in the womb…

_Together, Raven…_

In the womb…contained, imprisoned, meaningless…

_Together Raven…Let us go…_

In the womb, about to be born…about to be freed…

_Together…_

When Raven awoke, the windows had again been shattered sometime during the night, and the gentle wind of the ocean was rustling her bed sheets.

The breeze was laden with moisture and salt, her blankets and pillow already damp. Raven knew that she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep again, after all, nothing is worse than a damp pillow to sleep on. She blinked slowly, deep velvet eyes staring off into the hazy pink clouds that stretched across the city. The sun wasn't up yet. It was still night.

_Not dawn yet. _

Raven let her eyes close and leaned back against her pillow, waiting for the dream to dissipate, but it didn't. She could still hear the voice, still recall the words. The echoed throughout her thoughts, like a broken record in an empty auditorium.

Beast Boy was alive…but barely. He was in the lower sections of the building, breathing, eating and drinking through a series of tubes, surrounded by beeping machines and darkness. He wasn't able to speak…he hadn't even opened his eyes yet.

Raven…couldn't blame him.

The only way that Raven could describe yesterday afternoon was quite frankly like experiencing a small corner of Hell. There had been so many people, so much shoving, so much _noise_. News crews were flashing pictures left and right, microphones being shoved in every face, some people were crying, some people were making signs, and some just stared. Beast Boy had been taken to the Titan's Tower mainly because Cyborg had all the equipment of a normal hospital and then some. They also had the only equipment that could handle a patient as…unpredictable as Beast Boy. He'd been flown over from Terra's house by chopper, swooped down to the medical wing, and kept hidden behind the numerous white backs of the doctors as tubes were attached, anesthesia was administered, and grimacing gazes were exchanged. The doctors managed to keep three titans behind a glass wall…but non of them could stop separate Cyborg from Beast Boy's side. Nothing could. Not with the expression he had.

The metal Titan had stayed there until his friend was in a stable condition. His face so pained, so infinitely _afraid_.

Raven truly didn't know what had happened until she saw that face. Only then did she realize that something truly _terrible_ had happened. She'd never seen Cyborg look like that. And she never wanted to again. She'd seen him angry…sad…lonely…but never like this. She'd never thought there'd be a day that Cyborg could look the way he did situated in that room, amidst all that bright, white, hospital light. Amidst those shuffling white coats and beeping, clunky machinery. Maybe this was how he looked after _his_ surgery. Sad, afraid, and at such an utter loss.

Thus…was Cyborg.

Starfire and Robin were still out of the Tower at this time. They didn't know what happened until they got back, having to push their way through a throng of scared, teary eyed people and flashing, yapping reporters. As soon as Robin realized what had happened…he was on his way out again. Ready to do what birds of prey did best.

Hunting.

Ready to go hunting down whoever did this and not willing to return until he found it out. Just like Robin. Ever the vigilante.

He was told that he was searching for the same man as before. The same killer as the others. If they had hoped that this news would stop him, they were sorely mistaken. All this news did was make it personal. Robin was _dangerous_ now. As it always had been with Robin when faced with bad news, he makes himself worse. More dangerous. More edgier. He was a predator now. He would remain a predator until this man was caught.

Thus…was Robin.

That meant that Raven had to share the waiting room with Starfire…which basically meant she had to sit in a chair, patting her companion aimlessly on the back of her head as the Tameranian bawled hopelessly into her lap as medical chaos ensued in the next room.

Raven just watched the back of Starfire's head as sob after sob echoed into her lap, her English and her Tameranian garbled together whenever she tried to speak, emerald eyes glassed over with tears.

And something. _Something_ about the way she cried. Something about the way her stomach fluttered on Raven's leg, something about the way her tears moistened the hem of her cape…made something heavy and horrible bob in her throat.

Raven had never cried. It was the unspoken rule of her life. Raven. Never. Cried. Grief was shrugged off. Tragedy was ignored. Sadness controlled by meditation.

Until now.

For the first time in years.

Raven cried…just a little.

And it _stung_.

It _hurt_.

Her tears had come silent and hot, her sobs almost undetectable. But they were there. She could feel them.

Although the best excuse was in the next room…Raven knew she was crying because of something more than what'd happened to Beast Boy. Something that only Starfire could coax out of her. Something about that Tamaranian.

For some distant reason, hidden behind the moist, hot fog of her tears…Raven knew that she wouldn't have been crying if Starfire wasn't here with her.

Thus…was Starfire.

Thus…was Raven.

After five grueling hours…the doctors said that Beast Boy was going to make it. A close call for sure…but he was going to make it.

And that was that.

He was in stable condition now, locked inside a plastic curtain, dressed in a spotted hospital gown, masked in clear, plastic tubes and masks. His eyes were shut, skin pale, heart rate monitor…steady. The doctors all gradually seeped form the Tower as the sun disappeared behind the horizon of skyscrapers and the stars slowly began lighting up across the sky.

He was going to make it.

But the damage had been done.

With that news, the Titans all did what none of them should have done. They went into their separate rooms. A hundred different worries worrying four different minds. None of them wanted to be alone…but not one had the stomach to talk to anyone else. Contrary to what most people said…whenever something truly terrible happens. Something you never thought could happen. You don't want the comfort of another. You don't want a sappy, clueless exchange of half-hearted words trying to comfort you. You want to be alone. You want isolation…if only for a little while. For them…it lasted the entire night.

Thus…were the Titans.

Raven hadn't been able to do anything but sit in her bed. Sit and stare at the ceiling like she had for so many sleepless nights. Was this just another one then? Was it any different from any other? She'd stared at that ceiling before, felt something cold and awful pull at her ribs. She just never cried.

_The nightmare is the same…you just screamed this time…_

She sat there until she'd somehow fallen asleep.

And now Wrath had sent her another dream.

Ambiguous, meaningful, and laced with…longing.

Her eyes moseyed over to her clock.

Ten after Four. Perfect. Too early to get up, too late to go back to sleep. She slipped back against her pillow, huffing and bringing up a forearm to her forehead. She felt sick.

'_Raven.' _

Her eyes opened. Her breath caught in her throat.

The Red Raven was at the edge of the bed.

It's crimson robes stood in a moist, but stark contrast with the rest of the room. It seemed to glow in the pre-dawn murk, face hidden in the veil of its hood.

'_Raven.'_ It whispered again, lips parted ever so slightly.

"No." Raven said, index fingers going to her temples, eyes squeezing shut. "I refuse to hear you, Wrath. Not now."

The voice seeped through regardless. It sounded so…_delirious_.

'_Raven. It's close. Open your eyes and see. Remember it, Raven! Remember! Your dream had purpose! It would mean so much if you just tried to remember! Remember, Raven!'_

"NO!"

When her eyes opened again, the room was empty. A breeze rustled her covers slightly as the sun's rays finally burst from over the horizon, illuminating her entire room in a pale yellow scrim. Raven raised her hand instinctively over her face…and froze.

The mark of Scath shimmered on her palm.

"No…" Raven said again…only this time, she whispered. "Please…no…"

Another breeze rustled her sheets, carrying the faintest of voices with it.

'Remember…remembe-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-r…'

_xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx_

By that afternoon, the four remaining Titans sat around in different locations in the main room of the Tower. Starfire sat at the far end of the couch, a three foot high stack of used tissues lay crumpled on the floor beneath the armrest. Robin sat next to her, in the almost exact same position he had been in when he sat next the Beast Boy, arms folded, leg crossed, body tensed. Raven, her hood drawn, hovered cross-legged on the other side of the room, facing out into the city, but taking into consideration every word Cyborg said as he paced back and forth in front of the couch. They were back together…but there was nothing warm-hearted or comforting in any of the forlorn glances they gave each other. No smiling words of comfort, no kind pats on the back. These were the Titans when they meant business…and non of them were displaying that better than Cyborg. He still had his serious face on.

"I went off to check on Beast Boy about twenty minutes after I last spoke to him. I tracked him by his communicator to Terra's house. The entire place was trashed to say the least. Looked like Beast Boy and our man had one hell of a fight. Both Terra's foster parents were dead when I got there. B.B. was in a chair with the guy sitting in front of him. Looked like he was…talking to him about something. I'm not sure. I shot him through a window as soon as I saw him."

Robin spoke, speaking callously, almost to himself. "What was he saying?"

Cyborg found an unoccupied edge of the couch and fell into it, slapping his hands on his knees. "I have no idea." He said. "All I know is that this guy is young. He's only a kid. No older than any of us." He glimpsed out the window and sighed. "Only a kid." He sad again for no real reason.

"Was there anything else about him? Anything we could use?"

Cyborg rolled his head forward and sighed to the floor. He seemed hesitant.

"Yeah." He said.

Raven suddenly felt his eyes fall on her.

"Rae, I think you've got a friend in this city."

Raven's body tensed, although she didn't turn around. She didn't say anything. Luckily, Robin did as he shot from his seat.

"_What_?"

Cyborg sighed again, running a hand over his head. "This guy…he…had the same powers as Raven." He glanced over. "He looked like you…he moved like you…Jesus, Rae he even almost _acted_ like you."

Starfire stood up and piped in, still maintaining some of her innocent alien ignorance. "That is a lie!" She said, nose still red. "Raven would not act in such a terrible, hurtful way to our friend Beast Boy despite her threats and evil eyes!"

Her statement was ignored…but in its own Starfire-ry way…it helped.

Robin didn't speak for several seconds, his face turning grim as he sat back down. Finally he glanced up at Raven, then back at Cyborg. "Are you sure?"

"Am I sure?" Cyborg repeated with a sarcastic laugh. "The son of a bitch pinned me too a wall with one of her spells. I'm _positive_, Robin."

A pause…

…Then, slowly, all three pairs of eyes eventually moseyed on over to the blue caped girl hovering in the corner. Her back remained turned. Her eyes out to sea.

"Raven?" Robin asked slowly. "Do you…know anything about this?"

Slowly, she closed her eyes, speaking in almost a whisper. "I don't know…"

_Liar…_

"Oh, please, friend Raven." Starfire said, rising from her seat. "Anything will be helpful! Surely you must-"

Raven remained facing the window, hood up. "I came here _alone_, Starfire. I _had_ a mother but that's all."

From somewhere deep inside her mind, something stirred; like a ripple across a glassy sea. Something trying to break the surface. Something trying to get remembered. Raven's head jerked to the side, teeth biting shut.

_It's nothing._ She told herself. _Why shouldn't be nothing?_

Cyborg didn't notice and huffed. "Well this guy sure didn't hit like a girl." He said, rocking himself up from the couch and approaching the fridge."

Robin ignored him, eyes still hovering on Raven. "Is there anybody else? Anyone else that you know of that could do those things?"

Another ripple. Another cringe. "No…" She finally said. "My father was responsible for all of that. The teachings of Azarathian telekinesis is bestowed only upon...those like me."

If Beast Boy had been there…he would have no doubt made a bad joke, a snide comment, or something to lighten the mood.

But he wasn't there.

He was in the basement

With an arm missing.

Looked like the mood will have to be kept at the current setting.

Robin sighed. "Fine, let's get a schematic of the city and see if we can locate him. You said he took a communicator right? Maybe we can use it to get a lock on him."

"Tried that already." Cyborg said, removing something from the fridge. "He must of disabled it somehow. He's completely off the chart."

Robin didn't respond. He usually didn't. He was still in predator mode. "Just get me schematics." He finally said.

Outside, the clouds had rolled over the sun, sending a momentary shadow over the tower. The sun's rays lit them from behind like a grand, white projector…illuminating the clouds the background of a dramatic Renaissance painting. Distantly…for a fleeting moment…it somehow reminded her of home, her _real_ home. Her memories were shattered of course…scattered throughout her mind like the foundations of a long since burned down building.

Childhood memories was where most of them were. That's where a lot of things were.

The most prominent…of course…were those fields. Great, big, rolling fields. Rolling on forever, rippling in the breeze in swaying waves like an emerald ocean. They stretched on forever, off into the horizon where it melted away into the transitional mist between the land and the eternally orange sky with full beautiful clouds, slowly passing over in an endless cycle.

She could see them now, hidden behind the hazed veil of the past like staring at an object beneath a frozen lake. It may be murky, unreachable…but it was there. She'd seen it. She'd been there.

It had been freedom…it was perfect.

It was her past before she knew of Trigon. Before she knew of the Prophesy. Before she knew of _Earth_.

She had only been four at the time…innocent, happy, and untainted. She could remember those sunny, open days, frozen in a place where time had no meaning. Existence had no purpose.

And she would _run_.

With the wind in her hair.

The grass hissing by her thighs.

The endless orange sky spinning over her head.

She would run until the soft, strong hands of the monks found her. Hoisting her up with drawn hoods and empty faces. She would often be led away from the fields, back into those sharp, dark cathedrals. She could still remember the way their hands grasped her wrists as she followed after them. Strong, protective…but by no means paternally.

Then…she'd always look over her shoulder. Back at those fields.

Those endless rolling fields.

Her hand would wave, her feet stumbling, her head bouncing…but she would _wave_.

_Goodbye…paradise…I'll see you tomorrow…_

Then…the Red Raven muttered something.

Raven snapped up from her stupor and turned. The remaining Titans were gathered around the large screen, looking through blueprints of the city.

Backs to her.

Voices hushed.

She lowered herself slowly to the ground and suddenly realized that her hood was down. Furrowing her brow she raised it again and cleared her throat.

"I need to meditate." She said, having no intention of doing so.

The three remaining Titans didn't respond and didn't notice as Raven disappeared into the hallway.

_**xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**_

A door hissed open into a large, black room. Standing in the doorway, a small red dot bounced unhappily from a boy's lips. In his hand, there was a large duffel bag. His gaze was on the floor.

"Back already?" A voice droned from the darkness. "That was quicker than I expected."

The red dot answered. "Don't act like I work for you."

A pause.

"Hmm. You're tone was much lighter earlier on today. Did something happen?"

"Thing's didn't turn out quite as I planned. I…overdid it again. It's a bad habit."

"From what the news has told me Beast Boy is still alive and in stable condition. The entire city is looking for you… not to mention the other_four_ you promised me dead. _Quite_ the bad habit. "

The boy's voice suddenly rose. "_Three_. There were only _three _Titans was that I promised. I'm not killing them all."

"So far you haven't killed _one_. Are you sure you can fulfill your promise?"

The boy's words caught in his throat.

"I'm…I'm _sorry_ about my attitude. I just need more _time_. Please. I can do it! I know I can! The Titans East-"

"…are _not_ the Titans you're dealing with now."

"…"

"Understand?"

"…yes."

"Good. You'll have your device when you finish."

"You've….you've already _built_ it?"

The voice from the other side of the room chuckled. "I like you, boy. I can see how…dedicated you are. You have so much _potential_."

"Thank you. Uhm…I'm flattered."

"I must confess you've tickled my curiosity. Of all my records I have in my big ol' computer…I can't seem to find one for _you_. You're an utter ghost, my friend. There's never been a face that I've haven't been able to put a face to. You're an exception. The first."

"I've always been sort of secretive. It's a bad habit."

Another dry, knowing chuckle. "I wouldn't say that."

"You have the device though? Completed?"

"Yes. In my holding area. Safe until the bargain is completed."

The boy bowed, cigarette crushed between grinning teeth. "Oh, thank you. Thank you so _much_ Mr. Slade."

From the darkness, a masked face grinned. "You are welcome. Now get going."

"Yes. Yes I will."

The boy turned and headed for the door, a noticeable bounce in his step.

"And boy?"

The boy stopped.

"You should really stop smoking. It's not healthy for someone at your age."

The boy removed his cigarette, glanced at it with a raised brow, then replaced it.

"Yeah…It's a really bad habit."

The door hissed shut.

Ending Author's Note: More coming soon.


	7. Chapter 7 The Cathedral of Seraphs

Author's note: Revised & Reposted

-Bert the Nomad

The cathedral was huge, overwhelming in its emptiness, overpowering in its silence. It had been long since abandoned, located deep underground in the forgotten catacombs of the city.

Forgotten.

Alone.

The slow decay of time had inevitably done its damage; the great stain glass windows were blackened, some broken, some just replaced with empty frames. The building in its entirety was immense, two massive towers marking the entrance, laden with rotten sculptures and decaying tile work that stretched upwards into the ceiling.

Along the walls, situated on blackened pedestals and dripping cracked outcrops…were angels.

Hundreds of them.

Their robes fluttered and cracked, their faces frozen and absolute.

They stared.

Arms spread, hands clutching dribbling stone relics, wings outstretched and beautiful.

Their gazes were all aimed upwards, their posture unbroken and defiant against the emptiness of the cathedral. Undying seraphs. Unending guardians.

Except for one.

One angel, blackened by mold and moisture, lay on the cathedral floor...in ruin.

Fallen.

One of its great wings was shattered, crushed beyond recognition against the marble, a mighty stone sword next to it...just out its reach. Its stone eyes were locked with the cieling, its arms up stretched. Far above, one could see its pedestal amidst the many occupied others, the former occupant replaced with a single stone foot broken off at the ankle.

But the angel's gaze wasn't on its pedestal.

It was one something else.

Something far, far away.

Fat warm droplets of water fell from the ceiling, like the after math of a downpour. The entire left wall was covered with withered cracking pipes, all running together to form an incredibly complex organ, the cylinders spreading out from the central keyboard like rays from a sunset. A great hole, he size of the great round stain-glass window that stretched across the back wall rested in the middle of the floor. The surrounding tiles had collapsed into itself, falling into a great underground pool, dark as oil. The seldom drops of moisture that collected on the random outcroppings that were positioned throughout the room echoed as they fell to the floor, endlessly reverberating off the massive stone walls with a gentle ringing sound, changing frequencies as the sizes of the drops varied, humming in an unexpectedly similar tune to the ancient voices of the choirs that once sang in the long forgotten halls.

It was a gothic dream come true. It was the work men put their entire _lives_ into. Every detail was hand crafted. Every stone purposeful. Every fixture decided. It was its own world, cast into a timeless, tired shade of blue and black.

And then…the tranquility was suddenly shattered as the two massive doors at the far end of the hallway opened, casting a single pale beam of blue light across the forgotten sanctuary of the cathedral.

At the base of the great column of light stood a shadow. The sounds of the raindrops were quickly drowned out by a series of heavy drawn out footfalls and the sound of something heavy being dragged across the stone floor, scraping up a thin shower of sparks. The wide brimmed black hat bobbed ever so slightly, leaning from one side to the other as he hauled the large device behind him, inch by inch.

He slowly drew his hand across the room in front of him, and as if activated by switches, individual torches sparked into life one after another, casting the massive room into an atmosphere of jagged shadows and soft flickering light.

The boy released the device, letting his hand fall to his side. For several seconds he just stood there, his mouth opened just a sliver and a thin silver cloud of vapor escaping from his mouth periodically, then, he quickly turned and pressed a small red button in the middle of the oval device with a gloved index finger. As soon as the button was pressed, the machine fractured, expanding outwards and segmenting itself as it activated into the pre-firing stages as jets of steam billowed from the crevices and flowing across the floor. An automated female voice filtered through an unseen speaker.

_Activation complete…_ A small panel opened up at the top of the machine and a thin blue button flickered on.

_Firing precautions initiated…awaiting firing command._

The boy exhaled, his breath trembling as his black eyes reflected the glowing blue dot. His quivering hand slowly moseyed up to the red button again and pushed it.

_Power off._

The device collapsed in on itself, returning to its shut down mode.

There was another hiss of steam.

Then silence.

The boy did not move again for several seconds, the slow whispers of the cathedral were just returning when his shoulders began to quiver. A short almost inaudible series of sob-like giggles filtered between his clenched teeth, his eyes squinting shut hand his head slowly shaking from one side to the other. His hands shot to his chest where his sacred picture was kept. After a second, his gloved hands removed the photo and held it in front of his watering eyes.

"I…did it." He whispered.

The girl in the photograph stared back.

"I stole it. I took it right from under his _nose_. I have it now. I have it _here_. I'm so close now. _We're_ so close."

He bit his lip, falling to his knees.

The girl in the picture stared.

"We're so close. We're so damn close."

The boy leaned forward until his head rested against the floor. It felt cold. It felt wet. But he wouldn't be feeling _anything_ much longer. Not anymore.

Something orange stirred from underneath his pale, white skin, rippling like a fiery gem at the bottom of a restless stream.

It shimmered. Then took shape.

His teeth ground together, his words wrought…almost vicious with emotion.

"I…I…need…you. Raven. I…m-miss you so much…"

The image began to spread, creeping down his back, winding up each arm, closing around his face, its path silent and swift.

It shimmered into entirety, becoming recognizable against his body.

The Mark of Scath, glowing as brilliantly as a neon light on a rainy, cold day.

It glistened…

It _burned_…

But the boy took no notice.

His eyes were shut.

The great doors slowly shut again, grinding against their rusted, black hinges.

Closing off the Cathedral of Seraphs.

"I'm…coming for you. I'm gonna find you…no matter what."

…Only now…there were _two_ fallen Angels inside.

Author's Note: More to come


	8. Chapter 8 Crow

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted

-Bert the Nomad

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

Raven was leaning over Beast Boy's bed as the clock struck midnight. The only sound coming from the hum of the fluorescent lights, the gentle hissing of his breaths through the oxygen mask, and the ever constant chime of his heart monitor.

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

His eyes were open. Glazed, glassy, and wet. They stared at her through that shiny plastic curtain with such a lost look she couldn't tell if he could see her or not. It was all she could do to stare back.

His eyes seemed so distant; as deep and empty as a foggy night sky.

Hundreds of plastic tubes still interconnected around his body like a thick ropey spider web, connecting to machines, pouches, needles, and body parts. The brilliant overhead lights bore down on him with a merciless brilliance, illuminating him like an art piece in a high class museum.

_Leonardo Da Vinci's greatest work, _Raven thought grimly. _The Pieta de Beast Boy_

She shook her head as she looked at him…at that stump of an arm; bandaged, taped, gauzed and white. Just beneath his arm, though, Raven could still see a dull red hue staining his sheets.

It seemed like _nothing_ could make all that red disappear.

His blankets had been kicked down to his mid-thigh, his hospital gown crinkled like a used tissue. Every so often his hand would move. Never for any particular purpose. Just a twitch of a finger, a clench of the fist…small little actions that he would watch through his foggy green eyes with an unreadable expression.

Maybe he was trying to remember what it was like…with his other arm.

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

…_beeb…_

'…_Raven…'_

Raven's head jerked up.

The room was empty, the air stiff.

'_Raven_…'

The girl's eyes swept the room twice, her teeth slowly starting to grind together. "Show yourself." She said quietly. "I know you're there."

For a moment the room remained still. The heart monitor continued chiming, the clock continued ticking, and then…like a body drifting up from a bottomless black well, a shape on the far side of the bed shimmered into being. It seemed to glow, distorted and misshapen behind the shiny plastic curtain.

It was red.

'_Raven…_' The voice whispered again. '_He saw.'_

Raven was upright in a second, her teeth bared. "Stop this." She hissed. "You stop his right this moment!"

'_He saw…and so can you. You can finally remember.'_

"Stop it. You have no power over me. You stay _quiet_."

'_...Please…try…'_

Raven's response was cut short by the chime of her communicator.

Her shoulders jumped to her ears as she let out a hissing gasp of surprise, falling back into her chair and yanking the communicator from her belt.

She glanced at the screen.

**CYBORG:**

Raven blinked, and let out a long, temple-rubbing sigh.

When she glanced up again, the room was empty.

Of_course_ it was empty.

Raven shook her head, flipping open the communicator with her thumb.

She tried to smile and didn't quite get there.

Cyborg wasn't smiling either.

"Hey Rae." Cyborg said quietly. "I Just wanted to check in. To see if everything's all right."

She shrugged, her eyes casting one last furtive glance on the far side of the curtain. "Beast Boy's fine."

"I meant with _you_."

She glanced back at the screen as a familiar prickle danced down the spine of her neck. It was the same prickle everyone gets whenever this happens. It was human behavior.

Of_course_ everything wasn't alright. Raven was about as far away from being alright as Beast Boy was from his next game of patty-cake. She was scared, alone, hostile and _both_ of them knew it. The real question was whether or not Raven was willing to talk about it yet.

She wasn't.

So she lied.

"I'm fine."

Cyborg bit his lip, leaning in. "Are you sure you don't want some company? Someone to talk to? We've all been through a lot."

Again…Raven shook her head.

She_wanted_ company alright…just not through words.

Not through some forced, pained conversation where you listened until it was your turn to talk and nodded your head in brow-furrowing sympathetic bullshit. Every time someone talked to her they immediately had a gigantic, fragile, Raven-shaped statue wedged in both arms. Throughout the entire conversation they'd stumble around, trying their best not to break their heavy load with any foolish remarks or careless comments.

She was just so fragile to them…and she had nothing to prove them wrong…

"I'm fine, Cyborg. I can handle myself."

Cyborg glanced to the floor. He looked like he was trying to prep himself for something.

A moment passed.

"Raven?"

_Here it comes…_

"Yes, Cyborg?"

"You're…not alright. I know that. You haven't been alright for _months_."

_Damn it, not another Sympathy Session 101…not now…_

She glanced away, again checking behind the curtains. "Look Cyborg, it's getting late…"

"You're not happy. You're _never_ happy. Everyone can see it. You're hiding something from us. Maybe even from yourself." Her teammate's face was steady, unwavering…although Raven could tell from his level expression and stiff tone that he'd spent at least two or three minutes in front of a mirror practicing. Raven could see him stumbling about with that statue, so careful not to let it fall…but never willing to put it down.

_He really wants this conversation...badly…_

"It's nothing you can help with." She said flatly. "And it's a matter I'd rather not discuss. It's personal."

"Jesus, everything is personal with you Raven. All your problems…all your hurts…everything is bottled up in that head of yours. We all know about your past! We beat it! _You_ beat it. Why are you still so cold to everyone? What are you still hiding?"

_Yes, Raven…what ARE you hiding?_

Again, something resurfaced somewhere in the misty sea of her mind, just long enough glint in the moonlight and submerge once again.

The big fish.

Raven recovered by getting meaner.

"Is that what this is all about? You want me to spill my guts out,_Cyborg_? You think I'm somehow responsible for what happened to Beast Boy?" Raven's tone was sharp. Wincingly so.

Cyborg glanced down again, shaking his head. Raven could see him struggling about with that statue…he was losing his balance. He wouldn't be able to hold on much longer.

"That's…not what I said."

She pushed him harder, adding weight, making it even more cumbersome. "Then why, Cyborg? Do you think that I'm still a walking apocalypse out for more blood? Do you think that if I wasn't here this somehow wouldn't have happened?"

"Raven, I didn't mean…you know I'd never…"

…_stumble…stumble…stumble…_

"Just how fragile do you think I am Cyborg? How fragile do you _want_ me to be? Fragile enough to go seeking protection from _you_? From any of you?"

"None of us think that! You know we don't think of you that way! Raven, I…I…"

…_stumble…stumble…stumble…_

"You_what_, Cyborg? Huh? Do you really care what happens to me so long as you're conscience is clear? As long as you don't hurt my feelings?"

"I…you…I mean…"

…_stumble…stumble…stumble…_

"Or are you just looking for someone out there who has an even more broken and flawed past than _you_?"

…_stumble…stumble…SMASH!!!_

Cyborg head shot up as sharply as a gunshot.

It took Raven a second to realize just what she said, but in that second she somehow managed to triumphantly smirk, like a hunter watching the deer go down through the cross-hairs.

She'd won.

It was over.

'_Atta girl, Raven. Atta girl.'_

Cyborg's brow drew together, fell back. His mouth opened for a second, then closed. A lump in his throat bobbed, then fell still.

It wasn't until he spoke again did Raven realize just how hurt he was.

"I'm…sorry." He said. "I didn't know you felt that way. I'll…leave. Sorry to have bothered you."

Suddenly Raven's brow lifted. Her breath caught. Her mind finally realizing that she'd said something she shouldn't have.

Something she really _really_ shouldn't have.

Nobody in the tower mentioned Cyborg's past. Oh, they all _knew_ it, they all read his biography, they all knew how red it was….but nobody mentioned it.

Ever.

Beast Boy did once. It resulted in an argument.

That was what Raven was expecting. An argument. Something to vent her frustration out of. A harmless, cheek flustering argument.

But that's not what she had now. She'd cut a little too deep for that.

'_You showed him, Raven. You really showed him good.'_

"Cyborg!" She spoke up, holding the communicator close. "Cyborg, I'm sor-"

The screen went blank.

"DAMN IT!"

Two overhead lights popped, the clock fell off the wall, and the communicator exploded against the floor from her trembling hand.

The heart monitor continued chiming. Regardless.

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

…_beep…_

Raven threw herself back in her chair, palms against her forehead. Teeth bared for the second time that night. That damn heart monitor…

She felt like crying.

It was all her fault. _Everything_ was her fault. She was just so damn _good_ at it why _shouldn't_ it all be her fault?

All alone.

Bearing the blame…again and again and _again_…as her friends crowd around her with good intentions and those shit-eating grins.

They all know that she has something to do with it.

So did the Red Raven.

The chime of the heart monitor drew her gaze over to Beast Boy.

His eyes were shut.

His eyelids trembling in his sleep.

He was remembering what happened.

Remembering the face that took his arm.

'…_and so can you.'_

Something tried to resurface again in the sea of her mind. Something hot. Something familiar.

'…_it__**wants**__ you to remember.'_

Raven felt a sudden fluttering cramp in her gut. She grunted, fell to her knees and hugged herself. Her skin began to sweat, her throat pinched, and something within the deep twisting darkness of her mind gave a very noticeable throb.

Something wanted out.

Meditate. Get control. _NOW_!

"Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…" Raven's tried her best to raise herself. To cross her legs. To levitate. To meditate. She was trying so hard she didn't notice a hazy orange shimmer beneath her skin as it spun lazily down her back.

Another wet, sounding throb pounded her head. It popped her ears. It took her breath away.

Her mind continued racing, trying to locate where it was coming from. _Where_ it was. _What_ it was.

Just meditate…you need to meditate…

"Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…"

Slowly, the room began to haze. Colors and contours hazed together and the beeping of the heart monitor gradually fell into cadence with the throbbing of her head before disappearing entirely.

"Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…Azarath…Metrion…Zinthos…"

Splotches of a familiar star-ridden black sky began fading into view like an ink stain through a white cotton shirt as all sound gradually faded into blackness. Grey and black debris slowly descended from the blackness, crimson eyed birds gently lofted onto the branches of gnarled, twisting trees, and a faint red scrim settled over the stars.

Raven glanced around, breathing heavily.

She was in her own mind again. But the thudding of her temples was still there. Only now…she could _feel_ it.

It shook the ground.

It rustled the birds.

It rippled the sky.

Raven pushed herself up to her knees, her lips pressed between her teeth. Rocks and stone clattered down from the mountains and the sky buzzed with the unhappy squawking of the black birds overhead.

No tranquility here. The place was experiencing an _earth-quake._ With each throb, it sounded like a door to an airplane got opened. The wind bellowed and hissed, yanking at her clothing and sucking up all noise like a thick, woolen blanket.

She was about to push her self up when-

"_Well thank GOD, you're here."_

She opened her eyes to a pair of pink boots.

"_I was beginning to worry that I was going to have to put up with this all day!"_

Raven pushed herself shakily to her feet, teeth pressed tightly together. The Pink Raven stood in front of her, her hip sticking sassily outwards and both her ears plugged with her palms.

She was Joy…but didn't look so at the moment.

"What's going on?" Raven called, her hands migrating up to her ears as well against the bawling gusts of wind.

The Pink Raven leaned forward, squinting.

"WHAT?"

"I SAID WHAT'S GOING ON?"

An inaudible huff. "YOU TELL ME! IT'S YOUR MIND, Y'KNOW!"

Raven chewed her tongue and glanced around, shielding her eyes with a raised forearm. The wind had dislodged some trees, debris, and a very unhappy looking Grey Raven; all of which were flying around overhead, tumbling over and over in the whirlwind.

Raven glanced back at Joy, yelling. "WHERE IS IT COMING FROM?"

"WHERE DO YOU THINK, BOSS?" Joy jabbed a finger over her shoulder. "CHILDHOOD MEMORIES! SOMETHING WANTS OUT! BAD!"

Raven winced and glanced behind her at the stone archway looming at the end of a winding stone catwalk. Its interior was shuddering, the space beyond distorted like an image at the bottom of a rippling pool. And, leaning comfortably against it, was the Red Raven.

Arms folded.

Toothy mouth grinning.

Waiting.

Raven glanced back at Joy who simply shrugged despite the gale. "_I__**TOLD**__ YOU THAT YAH OUGHTA SPEND MORE TIME IN THERE!"_

Red Raven caught her gaze and tilted its head to the side, sweeping an arm into the portal in a grand welcoming manner. Somehow…its voice rang through as clearly and evenly as a glass bell.

'_It's there…Raven. It's all in there."_

Glowering, Raven marched over, elbowing past Joy and making a beeline right for the smiling half-lidded girl. She snagged Red Raven's cloak around the collar and pushed her roughly against a pillar archway. It wasn't something she usually did…but she didn't even feel the slightest bit out of place doing it.

It felt right.

It felt downright necessary.

She pushed her back, snarling. "_What_ have you done?"

The Red Raven rolled its head to look at her. That smile never faded.

"_Why don't you just have a look for yourself?"_ She nudged her head in the direction of the portal with a mischievous bob of the brow._ "It's all in there. It's been in there all this time. You've just never looked hard enough."_

Raven shook her roughly, leaning in. "No. You _tell_ me. You tell me _everything_."

The Red Raven smiled and suddenly seized her wrists with a grip as rough and hot as a pair of leathery, freshly-ironed gloves. It plucked Raven's grip from its cape, pushing her hands out over her head and leaning, almost seductively, towards her face. Raven grunted and thrashed, doing nothing more than widening the white, gleaming grin.

"_Better yet. I'll __**show**__ you, Raven."_

"_Don't you even-"_

There was a horrendous wrench on her arms. Moments later, she was tumbling, head over heels through the archway. No sooner had she passed through, the he world around her shimmered away; replaced with a bright waving landscape of pinks, yellows, and oranges.

The black, star-ridden sky had faded into a deep rich orange one, populated by gigantic, towering clouds blushing in an early morning sun with a scope of waving, rolling hills just becoming visible through a rosy-tinted veil of mist. The sun wasn't up yet.

All noises ceased.

The thundering…had stopped.

Raven got slowly to her feet, her eyes sweeping the terrain. She bit her lip.

This was it.

This was her orange-tinted paradise.

Just the way she had left it all those years ago.

Why had the Red Raven brought her here? She remembered _this_ well enough. There was nothing here that she couldn't already-

"_Your friends…were here once. When they invaded your mind. You remember?"_

Raven turned.

The Red Raven stood beside her. Hood up. Face hidden.

"_The green one said…it was where air fresheners came from. He was…so clueless about it all."_

She offered up a closed fist. She glanced up to Raven as she opened it.

"_They know so little about you."_

Raven glanced down at the object Red Raven's palm.

A strawberry. Raven glanced back up.

"I prefer it that way." She said, pushing the offering aside. "Why did you bring me here?"

"_What do you remember about this place?"_

"I came here as a child." Raven narrowed her gaze. "But that was in the past."

"_It's morning."_ The red gaze fell on the horizon. "_You always came out for the sunrise."_

That white, toothy smile floated back to Raven for a moment. "_You haven't been in this part of your mind for nearly a decade. You've hidden from it. Do you not remember just what you've left behind?"_

"By the looks of it…a field."

"_Your__**paradise**_."

"An unobtainable fantasy and nothing more."

"_Oh, Raven…there __**is**__ more. You've just forgotten it."_

Teeth grating Raven turned, throwing back her hood and turning again towards the Red Raven. Strangely, it wasn't looking at her. Its gaze was locked on the horizon, searching…looking.

"Then show me!" Raven said tightly. "Show me what I've forgotten! Tell me now, damn it!"

Instead of answering, the Red Raven straightened. "_There_!" It whispered. "_Look, Raven! Look! It's coming! Look, Raven!"_

Raven did.

Nothing.

She turned back with a snarl. "I don't see anything! What am I supposed t-"

The Red Raven was gone, a sing-song echo masking its exit as the sun broke through the clouds and illuminated the entire valley.

"_Listen…"_

Again, Raven did.

Only this time…

"_Come on! Keep up! Keep up! We don't want the monks to see us!"_

A voice.

From behind.

A child's voice.

A girl's voice.

Raven turned around completely just in time to see a small girl come running around the hill. Her hair was purple, her eyes were wide, and her small white cloak fluttered carelessly in the breeze. She tripped, stumbled, righted herself, and ducked behind a tree, giggling.

"Hey!" Raven called, taking a quick stride towards the girl. She looked too small to be one of her emotions, and too _real_ to be one of Wrath's tricks. The little girl was there alright. She was _there_.

"You! Girl!" Raven called again. The little girl didn't respond. She remained hiding behind the tree. Back to her. Giggling.

"I'm talking to you! Hey!" Raven walked up towards the tree, reaching a hand towards the tiny shoulder of the little girl.

Then.

Another voice.

A boy's voice.

Just as young, just as anxious.

"_Slow down, Raven! I can never keep up when you run! I don't want to lose you out here!"_

'_Raven'_

Suddenly the little girl turned and continued running, casting a quick glance over her shoulder and laughing...allowing Raven to get a look at her face for the very first time.

She gasped.

Fell backwards.

The little girl continued on, weaving side to side in the knee-high grass before ducking behind another tree.

The little girl was _her_.

Ten years ago.

Youthful, happy, and still in Azarath.

This was one of her memories. She'd hidden behind that exact same tree ten years ago. But…she had been alone…hadn't she? There had been nobody else there with her. That's how it always had been.

Then who…

"_Slow-Bird! Hurry up! We have to get to our secret spot!"_

Raven's insides suddenly tightened. Her breath caught. All strength left her legs, her arms. That migraine suddenly flared across the back of her skull like wildfire.

Something wanted out….and that something was coming.

"_I'm coming Raven! I'm not as fast as you are! I can't keep up in the long grass!"_

From around the bend, stumbling and tripping, came the smallest of figures. A boy no older than the girl ahead of him. His frame was thin and hard, his arms lanky but wiry, his stride tired but persistent. In his hand swung a lime-green basket full of strawberries. He was running…

That boy…

Raven craned her neck, trying to get a good look at his face……but unlike the girl, his hood was up. Raven couldn't see anything.

Without even giving Raven a second glance he hurried by. By now the girl ahead of him had ran ahead and was struggling up a steep hill with the persistence and agility of a cat. She was still laughing. Still teasingly taunting.

"_Hurry up, slowpoke! You've got to hurry up! The sun will all the way up before we can see it! We've got to get to our secret spot!"_

_The secret spot. _Raven thought._ I remember this. This happened. I was running...…I had to see the sunrise…I was running to my secret spot to watch the sunrise…_

Slowly, she rose to her feet.

_I had to see it…I have to see it…_

She took two shuddering steps, grasped her head, and forced herself to take two more.

_I have to see it…and only I know the way_.

Wincing against the fire in her head Raven pursued, keeping her hazed gaze on the fluttering white coat of the boy as he thrashed his way through the writhing sea of grass ahead of her, the basket of strawberries rocking back and forth with each stride.

Raven pushed herself harder, gritting her teeth as wave after wave of grass crashed into her thighs. She didn't know just how she kept her footing on the terrain…but then again, she'd already run this race. She'd already dashed through this very same field. Every tree she passed, every stone she tripped over…she remembered them all. She'd done it all before…she could name every obstacle…

_We'd taken a left at the tree at the top of the hill…we climbed over the rock-pile on the other side…I always ran…I could never stop running…_

Already she could see the tree, outlined against the pre-dawn sky like a black, knurled shadow on an amber floor. Beneath its branches, laughing and waving her tiny arms, Young-Raven called back at them in a winded, sing-song voice that echoed over the entire field.

Raven yelled it too, though she wasn't aware of it.

"_Run slow, run fast, run quick as can be! You can run yourselves old but you'll never catch me!"_

It was all the same…all of it. The tree, the field, the strawberries, the root…

_The root…_

She'd forgotten about that.

The gnarled root on the other side of the tree, hidden beneath a mound of grass and brush. She'd tripped over it as she turned to go. Normally she always avoided it, always leapt over it without a second thought…but not today…she'd been to excited. She'd been running. The root would catch her right under her left foot and send her sprawling onto the rocks. She'd get a scar on her knee from it. She still had that scar today. She could remember how much it'd hurt.

From up on the hill Young-Raven had just turned to go, fluttering her cape and dashing around the tree. She was laughing. Oblivious.

"_No!"_ Raven yelled. _"_Watch out! Watch out for the root! You're going to fall! You're gonna-"

From the far side of the tree there was a piercing scream followed by a resounding crash of brush, grass and fumbling limbs.

"Raven!" The little boy yelled. "Raven, what happened?"

_I'd fallen…I'd cut my knee…I was…crying…I was crying for help…_

The little boy took two steps, craning his neck. He waited, poised at the bottom of the hill, the basket of strawberries still in his arms. Then…Raven could hear weeping.

_Her_ weeping.

The basket fell to the ground and the boy took of running faster than before. His hood was thrown back. His cloak had been thrown aside. And he was running.

From her vantage point behind him, Raven could see the boy had a head-full of jet black hair. Perfectly straight, unreflecting in the pre-dawn light.

Raven followed.

The little girl atop the hill continued weeping, and with every footfall Raven took, she began to remember how it'd felt.

The morning was suddenly cold.

The grass was suddenly wet.

She never got to her secret spot.

She never got to see the sunrise.

She sat alone for an hour.

And that's how it was.

…but that's not how it is _now_…

There was a boy here. She wasn't _alone_.

_This isn't right…this isn't how it's supposed to be…_

When Raven reached the top of the hill she could see the two children. The girl was lying on her bottom, tangled in her cape and cradling her knee. Her nose was red, her teeth were bared, and her glassy eyes were glued shut.

"_I didn't see it…"_ She sobbed. "_I didn't see it! It hurts!"_

Crouched down in front of her, the little boy was holding the hem of his shirt over her wound. His shoulders were hunched, his head was down…and looked just as frightened as the little girl.

"_Your bleeding."_ He whispered. "_I don't know what to do."_

The little girl sniffled and dragged a sleeve across her nose. _"You're supposed to make it better. And do it quickly…we…we don't want to miss the sunrise."_

The little boy raised his head. "_Make it better? How?"_

Raven watched.

…_you kiss it, silly…_

"_You kiss it, silly! Now…hurry up!"_

The little girl winced and scooted forward a little, raising her leg. "_That's how it works. The boy kisses the boo-boo and makes it better."_

Raven watched.

"_But how does that help?" _The little boy asked.

Despite herself, Young-Raven sighed and rolled her eyes, still sniffling…still red eyed. She scooted closer.

"_It helps because it has to. When the girl gets hurt, the boy kisses her and makes her better. That's how it works."_

"_But…"_

"_And if you don't do it quickly, we'll miss the sunrise."_

"_But it's bleeding."_

"_I didn't make the rules. That's how it works."_

"_Uhm…alright. Hold stll."_

The boy leaned forward. Young-Raven interrupted.

"_Don't close your eyes!"_

He straightened immediately.

"_S-sorry. Sorry."_

"_Just…get it over with."_

The boy nodded, swallowed, and leaned forward again. Young-Raven tensed, sucking air through her teeth as the boy leaned forward. Then he glanced up. Quickly straightened.

"_Hey, why are __**you**__ closing your eyes?"_

Young-Raven responded without moving from her tensed pose. _"Because it's gross. Hurry up."_

The little boy hesitated, shook his head, and leaned forward one more time.

A moment passed.

Raven watched.

The clouds rolled overhead.

The morning was building up on the far side of the horizon…moments away from peeking.

His lips came within an inch of her knee…

Then….

The boy leaned up again with a frustrated sigh.

"_I…I don't think this is how it works."_

At this, Young-Raven opened her eyes. "Oh?" She said haughtily, crossing her arms. _ "And how __**does**__ it work?"_

The boy slowly cleared his throat, got to his knees. He looked like he was making a big decision.

Raven watched.

"_You'll need to…close your eyes again."_

Young-Raven tilted her head. "_Why? Is it gross?"_

"_Just…trust me."_

Tonguing her cheek, Young-Raven complied.

"_Now...don't move."_

She didn't.

Neither did Raven.

Very slowly the boy eased himself forward…sliding a knee on other side of the girl's legs and placing his small white hands on her shoulders.

Young-Raven visibly stiffened…but didn't open her eyes. She waited.

The young boy took a deep breath…and leaned forward.

He froze for a second…then…planted the briefest of pecks on Young-Raven's lips.

Utterly chaste. Utterly innocent. Totally unaware of meaning.

Just a kiss.

To make things better.

Because that's the way things work.

Raven felt her lips part as her heart fluttered up into her throat.

The girl's shoulders jumped slightly, her breath visibly caught in the chest and for a frightening moment…she looked as if she was going to recoil.

And then…her muscles relaxed, her lands lowered…and the moment passed.

Raven wasn't sure how long exactly she watched…but as those two little children sat there, the horizon silently exploded with light as the sun finally climbed over the hilltops. Clouds lit up across the sky like pink satin sheets as the valley was slowly claimed by a moving pane of soft orange light.

Raven stopped to shield her eyes as the wall of light hit them. The two children quickly broke apart, both their heads craning towards the brilliance of the sun.

"_Oh, we __**missed**__ it_…" The boy whispered. "_We didn't…get to our secret spot_…"

Young-Raven didn't say anything. Her fingers were pressed against her lips. She was blushing. Maybe…to her at least…it wasn't so chaste after all…

She finally glanced away, smiled, and turned back to the boy, taking his hand and leaning in.

"_I like here better." _She whispered, and turned her gaze to Raven. Looked directly into her eyes. And smiled.

Instantly Raven froze.

_She can't see me…I'm not really here…she cant' possibly see me…_

"_I wouldn't trade this spot…for the world."_ She said to Raven. "_Not one single bit of it."_

The boy turned to the girl, his back still to Raven. "_You…really think so, Raven_?"

Young-Raven smiled and entwined the boy's arm with hers, turning back to the sunset with a shoulder-wiggling sigh. "_I know so, Crow_."

_Crow…_

As if sensing her gaze, the boy suddenly turned around, Facing Raven for the very first time.

The narrow face, the high cheekbones, the black unreadable eyes, the innocent, smiling expression…

Crow.

Raven saw his face….and…somehow…he saw hers as well.

"_Yeah."_He winked. _"Me…neither."_

And with that…for the first time in over ten years…the dam in Raven's mind burst.

And this time…absolutely nothing could stop it.

ENDING AUTHOR'S NOTE: More coming soon.


	9. Chapter 9 You've Felt it Before

Author's Note: Revised & Reposted

-Bert the Nomad

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

What…isn't allowed?

…

…

No…that's not right way to put it. Too vague. Too general.

Better rephrase it.

…

…

What isn't allowed…for a _Teen Titan_?

…

…

…

Yeah…

That's better.

What isn't allowed for a Teen Titan.

_That's…_what he had to answer.

What were the things that weren't allowed for someone like him to want...to pursue…to _lust_ for…

…

Oh, it'd have to be something secretive.

Something cold and personal.

Revenge maybe.

No, no that's not right.

Something even more personal. Something essential. Something everyone else has. That everyone else takes for granted.

Dreams maybe? Imagination?

No. Too abstract. Too whimsical. This is something forbidden to the _Titans_, not a love-struck poet.

Ah…

…

…

…

What about love?

…

…

…

A…_forbidden_ love?

…

…

That's the one, isn't it?

Love.

A love…nobody else knows about.

One-sided.

Confused.

Sickly.

That's what a Teen Titan isn't allowed to have.

And that's _exactly_ what he had to answer for.

An illegal love. A prohibited affection.

…

But at least…for now anyways…it was a secret one.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The first thing Raven remembered was landing on something hard.

She grunted, wheezed, buried ashen fingers into her scalp.

Her lungs had seized up. Her throat pinched off like a knotted balloon.

…

She tried to breathe.

Tried to _think_.

But couldn't.

Nothing was working

…her insides were all full of hot air…

…her mind as weightless as a silken handkerchief caught in the laziest of summer breezes….

She felt like…

…distantly…

…as if she'd nearly died.

As if she'd been hauled up from a deep, gurgling ocean moments before drowning and was_ just now_ getting those first, fuzzy sweet breaths of air again.

Like she'd never really breathed until now…

Nothing was working…but it all felt so _good_.

…

….

…

Wincing, she rolled herself onto her back, let her body lay spread eagle, chest fluttering.

Red stars winked over her head, sparkling in a churning calm blackness behind the knurled black branches of a nearby tree.

There was no more thunder. No more howling winds.

The storm had passed.

A single blackbird fluttered onto one of the tree's outstretched branches, fluffing its wings. It met her eyes. Cocked its narrow black head.

Kawed once.

_…Raven…_

She stared up at it. Let her mouth slowly open.

It carried a voice.

She'd heard it before.

_…Raven…thank you…thank you…_

She tried to sit up.

But it tickled to move.

So she tried to think.

But it tickled to think.

So she did nothing.

And was tickled regardless.

…

…

…

She didn't know how long she lay there.

She didn't know a lot of things right now.

Hours may have passed during that dizzy, warm daze; watching the shimmer of the red-veiled stars gliding about overhead, the fiery red halo of the eternally eclipsed sun, the gentle churning blackness beyond it…

…just staring…

…and thinking of _him_…

She closed her eyes, her lips drawing back.

_…Him_…

…Oh…_him…_

_Him_ who was real again.

_Him_ who was **alive** again.

_Him_ who had been living under a silken, black sheet of doubt and denial in the back of her mind for the past 11 years.

…_Him_…

…who has stolen her very breath away…

…who had destroyed _everything_ she'd created.

Sanctity…order…_privacy_…

That was all gone now.

_…Him…_

_His memory had taken them all…_

Raven raised a hand to her cheek and closed her eyes. She felt warmth, she felt sweat…and…deeper…she felt something else.

Something she couldn't quite name…not yet…

"Crow." She whispered. "…Crow…"

_ 'That's is name, honey. Always has been, still is, and forever will be.'_

Raven opened her eyes.

Winced.

The Red Raven stood over her.

Grinning wistfully. Hood back. Hands on her hips.

_'So, how was **that** for yah, champ?'_ She beamed extending a hand.

Raven ignored it and rolled herself onto her stomach with a slow weary hiss. She pulled her knees in. Tried to find the strength to stand. God, it was difficult. Her insides were still weightless. She could feel them floating about in her bosom, light as air, ignorant as bliss.

No matter how good it felt though, no matter how much her stomach wanted to flutter or her shoulders wanted to bunch up to her ears, Raven composed herself.

Straightened.

Frowned.

And dutifully…pulled her hood back up.

…she _was_ still Raven, after all.

"Why…do I feel this way?" She breathed, batting dust from her lap and glancing over the Red Raven's shoulder where the archway to her Childhood Memories…to _him_…stood shimmering. "What did you _do_ to me?"

The Red Raven followed her gaze, hands idly slipping into imaginary pockets.

_'I thought you'd appreciate it, is all. **I** sure did.'_

Raven tried to take a decisive step forward, tried to express her dominance over her rosy red counterpart.

It didn't work.

Her stride was a stagger.

Her gaze that of a drunkard's.

Every word she spoke stumbled and tripped over her lips.

_What was the matter with her? Why did everything feel so **good**?_

"I _said_…what did you _do_ to me?"

A shrug.

_'I made you remember, and in case you're wondering, that **feeling** you have right now…it's called bliss. You felt it once. A long time ago."_

Raven managed another step, ignoring the uncountable bustling butterfly wings fluttering around in her stomach, the pinching, numbing tickle of her throat.

"You'd…never do something like that for me. You tried to kill me once. You tried to kill _everyone_."

The Red Raven glanced back at her, gently tilting her head. The four searing red eyes of Trigon had disappeared, replaced instead by a very real, very _human_ pair. Identical to her own aside from a faint crimson glint in the pupils, glowing like a sleeping bed of coals behind a stain-glass window.

Identical…

Again, Raven felt a twinge of discomfort by their resemblance...

'_Raven…'_ The Red Raven whispered. _'Why do you think that I'm always trying to **hurt** you? How is that whenever the blackbird fails to fly, it always blames her wings instead her own ignorance? I am not **evil**, Raven. I am who you **really are**. I want you to be content…I **want** you to-.'_

Raven cut her off, managing a scoff.

"To what? Be **happy**? I'm sorry but that job roster's already been taken and the _last_ thing I need are two pink capes running around this place. You wouldn't have done this just for _me_."

Red Raven only shook her head.

She looked so _sad…_

_'That's your problem, Raven. __Opportunity__ has been dangled in front of you so many times… but you never take it. You complain about being different…but secretly you **want** to be unhappy. You **want** to be alone.'_

"I've never had anything to be happy about. I live a damned life."

'_But the fact that you **live** all is good enough. As long as there's **life**, Raven, there will be the possibility of **pleasure.** A long time ago, you knew pleasure once.'_

The Red Raven leaned forward and slid a warm and endlessly smooth hand down Raven's cheek with a wry, loving smile.

'_You remember now, don't you? You remember how it **feels**_…'

The Red Raven's touch was electrifying. Before Raven could even react, another wave of shoulder-raising dizziness glazed over her vision. She gasped, tensed.

_That **feeling…**_

Despite herself, Raven felt her eyes close, her hands cradle her stomach, the smallest of moans hissing between clenched teeth.

_…**bliss**…this feeling is **bliss**…you've felt it before…_

The Red Raven's fingers circled under Raven's chin and held it up, her crimson, so-human eyes searing right through hers like hot embers through satin sheets.

_'I am not **hate,** Raven. I never was. I am not the Prophesy nor the flame behind your fears. I am **nostalgia**. I am **memory**. The mountains of Azarath. The fields of your childhood __Paradise__. Everything of your dreams that you've tried so long and hard to forget **just** because of a single nightmare.'_

She dropped her hand, breaking the spell.

Raven snapped to and straightened immediately. She glanced down at the Red Raven's outstretched arm then back up to those eyes. Those deep,_ sincere,_ eyes.

"That _nightmare_…." Raven whispered, breathing hard and batting her hand away. "…was _Trigon. _That _bad dream_ was the destruction of this entire **_world_**. The end to **_all_** worlds. And it was all my fault. Wouldn't that qualify as something one would want to _forget_?"

'_One smear on the canvas, Raven, should never ruin the whole masterpiece. Your memories of Azarath should not suffer because of your father. Do you recall **Crow** as being something worth forgetting? Hmm? Now that you remember his face, that **feeling…**do you still want to keep it hidden away?'_

The Red Raven reached out and grasped Raven's knuckles. Squeezed.

Leaned in.

So warm…so smooth…

Human eyes so pleading…

And again…against every trembling effort…that feeling laced down her spine; driving her teeth together, squeezing her eyes shut.

_That feeling…_

She could feel the Red Raven's breath against her neck,could feel her gaze as hot as a sunburn across her brow.

_'There was a time when you had a **life**, Raven. A life different than this half-hearted, cardboard cut-out **puppet**-show you're living now. The life where you met a little boy in the middle of an Orange-Tinted __Paradise__ who had no concept of fate, who was ignorant of your father's name. A little boy who saw only a little girl lost in a field. All he saw was **you**.' _

For the briefest of moments, Raven felt her mind fog. Could feel the Red Raven's half-lidded gaze cloud her thoughts like steam across a bathroom mirror.

The promise of Crow…

_Him…_

The promise of this _feeling_. The wonderful, guilty _feeling…_

_The feeling she hadn't felt in so **long**…_

When the Red Raven spoke again, its voice had changed.

It became softer…

Younger…

Ebbing and loving…

A boy's voice.

_'You've got to stop running, Raven. The only way I can catch you is if you stop running…'_

The world around her blurred, all colors melted away and every thought became muffled and silent.

_'Stop caring, Raven. Forget them as you forgot me…'_

"I…I…" She tried to speak but her words felt too heavy. She struggled, forcing herself to fight back.

Something wasn't right…

'_Just remember me. Remember what I've **given** you. Remember what I can **still** give you…"_

She bit her lip. Shook her head. Persisted. "I…shouldn't…I don't…even know…if you're _real_…"

'_I'm real, Raven…you know I'm real…'_

Harder. Wincing. She resisted. "No…you're trying…to trick me…"

Suddenly, the gentle, sweeping tone of the dark haired boy abruptly vanished, morphing into the booming, wincing hiss of the Red Raven.

It was getting impatient.

_'I'm **very** real, Raven. I took Beast Boy's arm. I took Terra's parents' lives. And if you don't stop running …if you don't let me catch you soon…I'll take **more**. I'll take this pathetic doppelganger of a life you've created and destroy everything you've convinced yourself to love. I'll take everything until there's nothing left for you to turn to but **me**…and I'll start with your friends…_

Raven's eyes jerked open, but the Red Raven was gone. She was standing back in the medical wing of Titan's Tower, standing on that shiny, checkered tile floor…only now…something had changed.

Four beds lined the wall.

Instantly, Raven's blood froze, that feeling of stupid, blind bliss replaced with a cold, _cold_ terror. A wet, cramping fear she'd _also_ felt freeze her insides before. In each of the beds, distorted behind a murky plastic curtain, lay the Titans; their bodies smothered in crimson bandages, an uncountable series of wires and tubing spider-webbing across their bed sheets and…lain gently across each of their faces…a single black handkerchief.

"No…" Raven whispered, her hands curling over her mouth. "He _wouldn't_."

The Red Raven's voice again seeped into her ear, those long, warm fingers gripping her shoulders from behind.

'_He **has**, Raven. He **has** and he **will **in order to get to **you.** He's **real**, Raven. He's real and he's grown all up…and he's never stopped chasing you.'_

The heart-monitor beside Beast Boy's bed started to flat line. It was followed quickly by Starfire's. Then Robin's. One by one, her friends went limp, their chests slowly ceasing to rise as the brilliant fluorescent light overhead beat down upon them.

It looked so peaceful…so quiet…

'_He's going to find you. Nothing you can do will change that. And if your so called 'friends' get in his way…'_

The grip tightened as the final machine gave out with a prolonged-

-_beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-_

'_…he will make them disappear. He'll take them away forever, Raven. All for **you**. Do you understand me? All because of **you**.'_

Raven tried to break away from the Red Raven's grip but she couldn't take her eyes off those four, glowing beds. The unbroken line on their heart monitors. The rattle of choked, final breaths through their oxygen masks.

_'You were not meant for this world, Raven. You were never meant to live among common **people**. You belong with **him**. You belong amongst people who **loved** you. Leave them, Raven. Leave them all behind and thrive in the childhood fantasy you've uncovered. Do it for **their** sake if you're too ignorant and clueless to do it for yourself…'_

"No…" Raven felt her nose begin to sting, her eyes growing hot. "I can't…he...wouldn't…"

_'I didn't want you to come to think of it this way, Raven…but you truly don't have a choice in this matter. If you don't let him catch you…he won't stop hurting them.'_

"No…no…he…he…_loves_ me…"

'_Yes, Raven, yes he **does **love you! And **that's** why he hurts them. That's why he took Beast Boy's arm. They're all in his way. They're all keeping **him** from **you**. Don't you see? He thinks he's rescuing you, Raven. He thinks…he's **saving** you. Is he really that wrong to believe so?' _

Raven kept her eyes shut, her body rigid and cold.

She breathed.

Lowered her head.

"Go away._" _She whispered finally.

'_Raven…'_

"Leave me alone. Just…get out of here."

…a pause…

…a sigh…

'_As you wish…Raven...I'll go. I'll go now.'_

Slowly, the steely, smooth grip slid from Raven's shoulders, the hot breathes fading from her ear and all around her, the room gradually began to warp, the very air curdling as colors and texture melted away like an oily canvas painting.

'_I'll leave you alone to make your decision…but if you ever need someone to talk to…you know where to find me……you'll always know where to find me………'_

Raven spun around, throwing back her hood.

"_I said leave me al_-"

_…beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…beep…_

The Red Raven wasn't there.

She stopped, glanced up, dragging a sleeve across her eyes.

From the far side of the plastic medical curtain, Beast Boy stared back at her behind closed, sleeping lids. Wired up like a car battery, glowing in that bright overhead light.

Sleeping.

Alive.

His artificial breaths hissing through the oxygen mask.

His heart monitor constant and steady.

Alive…and alone.

Raven was back in the real world again.

Dropped off like an orphan on a shady city street. No idea where to go. No idea where to turn. And a bleeding, unconscious reminder lying next to her of what happened when she took a wrong turn.

She fell to her knees and let herself rock back onto her heels, the burning in her eyes finally giving way to hot, salty tears.

"_Damn it."_ She whispered, pulling her hood up over her eyes again. "_Damn it, damn it, damn it, **damn** it…"_

Over the doorway, the clock struck midnight.

Ending Author's Note: More coming soon!


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